Pets

"Young and the Restless" star Kevin Schmidt's famous pet -- Yuma the Pig -- has scored a children's book deal and will go on tour to promote it ... but he needs to drop a lot of sausage first.

Yuma's a micro-pig -- which typically weigh 45 lbs ... but has ballooned to more than 80, meaning Kevin and his hog have some serious work to do before she hits the wheels of squeal in September.

In order to make weight, Yuma will be walked 4 times a day and fed only organic meals by a pro chef ... at a cost of $1,000 a week!

Yuma's easily been worth her weight ... having already hammed it up on "A-List Pets" with Ian Ziering, booked several $15,000-a-pop public appearances, launched her own clothing line, chalked up 32,000 Twitter followers, and -- not to be forgotten -- recovered nicely from her near-death experience on TMZ Live.

Now if we can only get her off the couch.

Cesar Millan couldn't stop one of his gigantic clients -- a Great Dane -- from attacking a neighbor during a training session yesterday ... TMZ has learned.

Sources tell us the 'Dog Whisperer' star was walking a group of dogs, including the Great Dane, near his home in Studio City, CA -- and none of the dogs were leashed.

We're told one of Millan's neighbors was out walking his own dog ... and when the neighbor reached out to let the Great Dane sniff his palm ... the dog suddenly bit the man's hand and forearm.

We're told Cesar followed the man to the hospital where he was treated and released. Unclear, at this point, how badly he was injured.

A rep for Millan confirmed the attack, and says Cesar was walking a "troubled dog" as part of its training, when it got "spooked by a neighbor." The rep added, Cesar is still caring for the dog.

We don't know yet how big this dog was -- but adult Great Danes range from 100 to 120 pounds.

A source close to the victim tells us "he's healing," and is following up with a physician today.

Coolio is banking on a whole lotta ass making him a player in the music biz again -- he's teamed up with a porn website for his new music video ... and it's filled with wet t-shirts, garden hoses, twerking dinosaurs ... and even Coolio.

Coolio tells TMZ ... Pornhub.com agreed to provide all the "talent" for his video -- "Take it to the Hub" -- and in exchange he's going to debut all his new music on the website.

We're told Coolio and co. banged out the vid in about 5 hours at a house in Sherman Oaks, CA. The video's pretty funny ... for some reason the director had to remind Coolio and the girls, "Smile while you're doing this. Look like you're having a good time."

This is 50-year-old Coolio's first album since 2009.

Best part of the shoot -- featuring Jessica Bangkok, Missy Martinez and Skin Diamond -- the catering was provided by the nearest El Pollo Loco.

Ay, dios mio.

DMX is a dog food connoisseur ... appreciating the nuances of dry vs. wet.

The dog-lover/rapper was on his way out of LAX when we asked if he'd ever sampled dog food.

X gave an educated answer from experience. He also had a strong, quick opinion on the healthiest canine food for human consumption.

The people at Facebook are heartless hypocrites ... censoring hunter/cheerleader Kendall Jones from posting the carcasses of the animals she's killed, but allowing others to post pics advocating Kendall's murder ... so complains Kendall's father.

Cody Jones says he contacted Facebook ... demanding they take down the "Kill Kendall Jones" page. Cody says FB told him to pound sand, because it didn't violate company standards.

The "Kill Kendall" page is a takeoff of Kendall's earlier postings ... where she proudly displayed her kills. The KK page turns the tables ... with the animals standing over a dead hunter.

Facebook tells TMZ, "We remove content and may escalate to law enforcement when we perceive a genuine risk of physical harm, or a direct threat to public safety."

Miley Cyrus will never forget her deceased dog ... because it's now emblazoned on her rib cage.

Miley inked the memoriam Saturday at a house party in Los Angeles. For some reason ... her good buddy Wayne Coyne from The Flaming Lips and another friend tatted the same design in honor of Floyd -- an Alaskan Klee Kai that died when he was only 2.

Floyd's death ... along with a bad reaction to antibiotics and hard partying ... led to Miley's meltdown earlier this year.

It looks like Floyd's mug is the centerpiece of the tat with the words, "with a little help from my fwends."

We'll always remember Floyd ... because we have to now.

A 19-year-old Texas Tech cheerleader says she's received DEATH THREATS over her penchant for hunting exotic animals ... and one of the harassers is one of the "Real Housewives of Miami."

KFC is calling BS on the "pit bull girl" who was allegedly turned away from one of its franchises because customers were grossed out by her bite wounds.

KFC claims there have now been 2 investigations -- one internal and one independent -- and both show "no evidence" such an incident ever occurred at the Jackson Mississippi franchise.

3-year-old Victoria Welcher's family claims the girl was kicked out because employees felt her facial wounds from the dog attack were upsetting customers.

KFC says it will still honor its $30,000 donation to assist Victoria's family in paying her medical bills.

The people calling BS on a story about a little girl who was thrown out of a KFC because her face made customers lose their appetite are themselves full of BS ... so claims the aunt of the girl.

3-year-old Victoria Welcher was supposedly kicked out of a KFC in Jackson, Miss. last month after an employee felt her facial wounds from a pit bull attack were upsetting customers.

New reports claim the story is bogus.

But Victoria's aunt, Teri Rials Bates, now claims it really happened and the franchise is in the midst of a KFC investigation.

Lisa Vanderpump telegraphed her disdain for a bizarre jury verdict against her famous restaurant through her famous dog, Giggy.

Our photog asked Lisa Tuesday night about the sexual harassment trial in which the jury just socked Villa Blanca with a $100,000 punitive damages award. A former waitress sued the restaurant and a manager, claiming the manager did all sorts of awful things to her.

Here's what's crazy ... the jury ruled in favor of the manager but nailed the restaurant.

Sara Evans' ex-husband has become a country music cliche ... fighting with his ex, dodging an arrest warrant, and so deep in debt his main assets are a couple dozen chickens.

Craig L. Schelske filed docs in his bankruptcy case, listing a mountain of debt and a sorry, short list of assets. For starters he owes Evans $333K. Lots of other debts as well.

Now the assets ... 25 chickens (valued at zero) and 2 bags of chicken feed. And then there's 60 DVDs, 3 silver coins and 40 books, all worth a grand total of $100. And of course there's a 12-gauge shotgun, a rifle and a hand gun.

He also lists 4 vacuum cleaners and a card table. As for cars -- he has a Ford F-250, a Chevy pickup, a Chevy Tahoe and a Honda 4-wheeler.

As for the warrant -- it seems Craig stopped paying Sara child-related expenses, so the judge slapped him with a contempt citation and made him a wanted man.

You may remember ... Evans and Schelske went through a brutal and ugly split ... he claimed she exposed their kids to drugs and alcohol on her tours ... she claimed he was banging the nanny and was obsessed with porn.

Two "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" stars are being sued after their dog allegedly attacked a 19-month-old and bit her on the face ... TMZ has learned.

According to a lawsuit filed today in L.A. Superior Court, Kaitlin Olson and Rob McElhenney (Dee and Mac) had a Father's Day party back in 2012 ... and the couple's German shepherd was off the leash when it bit the toddler "without provocation."

The child's mom, Julie DeLagarde, says she let it be known she didn't want her daughter around the dog ... but Kaitlin and Rob (who are married) did not leash the dog.

DeLagarde claims the area next to her daughter's mouth, including part of her cheek, was "hanging off with all the insides of her face exposed and blood streaming everywhere."

DeLagarde has blogged about the ordeal and posted pics of the child's scars.

In the suit, she says her daughter will be scarred for the rest of her life unless she has additional plastic surgeries down the road.

Melanie Griffith thinks she's a better parent than Antonio Banderas -- a dog parent, that is -- and she's dead set on getting custody of their three dogs in the divorce ... TMZ has learned.

As TMZ first reported, Griffith filed for divorce on June 6 after 18 years of marriage to Banderas.

Child custody won't be an issue -- their daughter turns 18 in September -- but sources close to Griffith tell TMZ she is angling for custody of their three dogs. The former couple has one terrier mix and two shepherd lab mixes they adopted last February.

Our sources say Melanie is the better dog owner between herself and Antonio ... and the pooches mean the world to her.

This video is the MOST Louisiana-ish thing we've ever seen.

Here we have swamp tour guide Lance LaCrosse ... getting up close and personal with two alligators BY CHOICE ... feeding them out of his own mouth.

In the video -- which was shot by a tourist last month -- you can see LaCrosse swimming in the murky water with two gators eating chicken and marshmallows (a delicacy apparently) from his hand.

Apparently in addition to being stupid ... this is illegal in Jefferson Parrish and wildlife agents are now reviewing the video to determine if LaCrosse should face charges.

"Meet the Parents" star Teri Polo has a house full of pets -- seven of the critters -- and while we're sure she loves 'em in her own way ... she just told the world they ain't worth jack.

We broke the story ... Teri's more than $700K in the hole to the IRS, so she filed for bankruptcy earlier this year -- and now she's taking inventory of her assets in new documents ... obtained by TMZ.

First, the sorta good news: Teri's assets include a 2012 Prius worth $16,800, jewelry worth $1,700, and some office equipment worth $225. Like we said ... sorta good.

Now the sad news: she also lists her 4 dogs and 3 cats as assets, but values them at a whopping ZERO dollars. She could be pulling an Aaron Carter -- who did the same thing last year claiming he didn't want creditors to liquidate his pooch.

Or maybe she just thinks they're worthless.

Terri's optimistic though ... she's hauled in $141K this year, and made more than $300K last year. In the docs, she lists her ability to continue working and earning residuals as her best asset.

Someone really needs a fresh 'Focker.'