You Might Want to Rethink

Kris Humphries' ex-girlfriend Myla Sinanaj has fully become single white-ish female ... telling TMZ she truly believes her new sex tape will make her the next Kim Kardashian.

Myla tells TMZ, "I may not like Kim, but she was smart and she's sexy and I look a lot like her so why not make a tape and make millions and get a reality show?"

Myla fully admits she shot the skin flick for Vivid porn studio -- which even hired a Kris Humphries look-alike to bang her silly -- saying, " I had a blast that weekend with someone I was attracted to and had chemistry with."

So we gotta ask ...

John Cena has just faced his biggest fear and lived to tell the tale ... and TMZ has obtained video of nightmarish ordeal.

No, we're not talking about another match against CM Punk -- his girlfriend Nikki Bella just dropped a massive bombshell on the WWE champ ... asking him about the future of their relationship.

It all went down while the two were filming for Bella's new reality show on E! called "Total Divas" which debuts July 28 ... and Cena is clearly uncomfortable when she asks.

Cena tells Nikki that "both marriage and family are difficult obstacles" for him -- but eventually ends up coming clean about his feelings towards marriage ... including his own failed attempt.

Posing with porn star Andy San Dimas -- while wearing a UNICORN HEAD -- has a Pittsburgh cop in huge trouble, but San Dimas claims the whole booty-shaking mess is a giant misunderstanding.

This all went down last weekend during a Pirates game at PNC Park, where Andy says she was doing her best to get on the jumbotron ... by shaking her ass in cut-off shorts, while wearing a unicorn head mask!

Awesome, right? Wrong ... because Andy says when an usher asked her to sit down, she tried to rile up the crowd by shouting back, "Oh, I'm sorry I was trying to have a good time at the f**king Pirates game!"

Not smart ... Andy was hauled off to the Pittsburgh PD station at the ballpark.

Andy says the cops were very friendly, and told her they had to boot her from the park -- but not before one officer asked to try on the mask.

Not smart again. That "unicorn cop" is now reportedly under investigation. It's unclear if it's the unicorn mask, the porn star -- or both -- that got him in trouble.

Farrah Abraham has NO IDEA who Trayvon Martin is -- but she thinks Trayvon is a woman she may have met ... because Farrah Abraham is an idiot.

"Backdoor Teen Mom" made the unbelievably stupid comments on the "Matty P's Radio Happy Hour" show ... when the host asked how she felt about the Trayvon situation.

"I feel like I've met her or something," Farrah blurted out of her stupid mouth ... adding, "It sounds so familiar ... I don't know what she is so I can't picture the person with the name right now."

Lil Wayne has decided ... the images of the rapper trampling the American flag during a music video shoot were NOT good enough for the final cut ... 'cause they've been edited OUT of the final version.

Just last month, Wayne caught a TON of heat during the filming of the video for his new song "God Bless Amerika" when a giant American flag was dropped on the ground -- only to be walked all over by Wayne.

Wayne insisted he didn't step on the flag on purpose ... but he didn't really have an excuse for dropping the flag on the ground in the first place (a major no-no).

Carly Rae Jepsen spent hours, upon hours practicing her pitching skills before executing what is arguably the WORST first pitch in baseball history.

Just kidding! She didn't practice at all -- at least that's what she implied to our photog.

If you missed it ... CRJ threw the first pitch at a Tampa Bay Rays game Sunday and it was HORRIBLE x1000.

So when our photog asked Carly, at LAX today, if she practiced beforehand ... she said, "Clearly."

But watch the clip ... something makes us think she was really trying to say -- "No. No I did not."

Now here's 22 more terrible pitches, including Mariah Carey and Baba Booey's. After watching, we're convinced Carly still takes the cake ...

Justin Bieber's got less respect for the little people than Godzilla ... so says a rep for the biggest janitor union in the country, after TMZ posted video of the singer taking a leak in a restaurant mop bucket.

A rep for 32BJ SEIU -- aka the largest property services workers union in the US -- tells TMZ, “Unfortunately, people are often oblivious to the fact that workers like our members are faced daily with the consequences of such thoughtless acts."

The rep adds, "[Bieber's behavior] serves as a stark reminder of the essential jobs that building workers perform and the very difficult conditions under which they perform them. We welcome a heightened awareness of workers’ dignity among young people, and hope many will be moved to work for economic justice.”

Maybe Bieber should suit up for a day or two and see what it's really like to clean up after spoiled little twerps.

Here's the pee bucket video again for good measure.

Like an older, hotter Justin Bieber ... Paris Hilton got in some trouble today for speeding through a residential neighborhood in a super fancy car.

Unlike Justin, Paris was busted in Beverly Hills (she wouldn't be caught dead in the valley) ... and law enforcement sources tell us she was only going 42 in a 25. Not exactly breaking the sound barrier.

In the end, Paris got a ticket ... and left without being chased down by Keyshawn Johnson.

Chef Anthony Bourdain doesn't take kindly to "young punks" who piss in restaurant kitchens ... so he went to Twitter and UNLOADED on Justin Bieber.

After TMZ posted the footage of JB relieving himself in a janitor's bucket in an NYC restaurant kitchen, Bourdain tweeted -- "The chef should have put his foot up this young punk’s ass."

The CNN star continued, "My dishwasher ain’t cleaning that up, squirrel balls!"

There's more ... "Looking forward to seeing him open for Menudo at the State Fair— in about ten years."

And just for good measure: "In a preemptive strike, I plan to tell my daughter that Justin Beiber tortures puppies."

Justin Bieber is an oblivious, self-important little twit who goes out of his way to make the working man's life miserable -- just watch this video of the singer pissing into a restaurant mop bucket ... and laughing like he's the king of the world.

The clip was shot in NYC earlier this year -- we're told Bieber and his idiotic friends were leaving some nightclub, exiting through a restaurant kitchen, and Bieber decided he needed to take a leak.

But rather than go to a bathroom like a civilized person, Bieber -- wearing pants that should literally be illegal -- whipped out his junk and whizzed into a yellow mop bucket used to clean the restaurant's floors ... meaning whoever's job it was to mop the place up had to physically change Bieber's disgusting piss water.

And the worst part ... Bieber's friends act like the restaurant should be HONORED that the singer decided to piss there. It's revolting.

Oh yeah, at the end of the video, Bieber sprays a photo of Bill Clinton with cleaning liquid for some reason ... saying, "F*** Bill Clinton!"

We don't know what Bill Clinton did to Justin Bieber ... but whatever it was, Bieber probably deserved it. Thank you, Bill. Thank you.

Justin Bieber is bringing sports fans together ... IN OUTRAGE -- because he dared to pose with Lord Stanley's trophy in the Chicago Blackhawks locker room!!!

A 'Hawks exec tweeted the pic last night of JB touching the Stanley Cup -- arguably the most revered trophy in sports -- with a customized Bieber jersey in the background.

The response was immediate ... and angry:
- If I see one more picture of bieber touching the cup I might just cut my own jugular #embarrassing

- And this is why I will kick the crap out of Justin Bieber! You do not touch the cup! You don't deserve to touch it!

- Bieber takin a pic w the cup and gettin a personalized blackhawks jersey is complete garbage. Where did your bruins flat brim go?

That last one refers to the night we spotted Bieber in a Boston Bruins cap ... right before they started playing the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup Finals.

"Big Brother" star Spencer Clawson is not a Hitler-loving bigot -- he's just saying terrible things so his racist friends in the house will like him ... so says Spencer's mother.

TMZ spoke with Donna Clawson ... who insists her son wasn't showing his true colors when "BB" cameras caught him praising Hitler and referring to a gay housemate as "Kermit the f**."

"Spencer really is a great guy," she tells us ... "This is not a guy that’s a bigot or a racist. And he’s not that way at home. He's a great guy."

So why would Spencer say such horrible things? Mama Clawson says her son is just trying to fit in with the racist, homophobic people in the house ... because it's the only way he can win the reality show.

"If you're in a group, you go along with the group talk and that is what is happening with him."

She adds, "This is a reality show. The purpose of the show is scheming behind each other's backs."

WARNING: Never pass out drunk at a Paris Hilton party ... because her immature friends will dress you up in embarrassing clothes and then take photos of you.

The above pic was snapped at Paris' 4th of July bash in Malibu ... and as you can see, some poor schmuck obviously had a little too much to drink and fell asleep on a beach chair.

Thankfully, Paris and her friends let him snooze peacefully until he woke up. Just kidding, they dressed him up in a bikini top and gave him a purse and sunglasses. Then took photos.

As far as we know, no markers were involved ... those are this guy's actual tattoos ... but still, HILARIOUS.

Except not really.

"Big Brother" contestant GinaMarie Zimmerman is gonna have a rude awakening when she leaves the house -- she's been FIRED from her day job after dropping the N-bomb.

TMZ has learned ... East Coast USA Pageant, Inc. is cutting ties with the 32-year-old pageant coordinator ... claiming they were shocked GZ could "display such acts of hate and racism."

As we previously reported, GinaMarie referred to welfare as "n**ger insurance" ... and the comments were captured on "Big Brother's" uncensored live Internet feed.

East Coast USA says GinaMarie has been an employee for 5 years -- but insist, "We have never known this side of GinaMarie or have ever witnessed such acts of racism in the past."

The pageant says, "We are actually thankful that this show let us see GinaMarie for who she truly is. We would never want her to be a role model to our future contestants."

"In a business where we are surrounded by beauty every day we are saddened to see something so ugly come from someone we put on a very high pedestal."

Aaryn Gries -- the Paula Deen of the "Big Brother" house -- has been dropped by her modeling agency after dropping racist and homophobic comments in the BB house ... TMZ has learned.

Gries has been under fire for referring to a gay houseguest as a "queer" ... AND for telling an Asian-American houseguest to "shut up and go and make some rice" ... AND for saying racist stuff about black people.

When referring to a black contestant, Aaryn said "Be careful what you say in the dark, you might not be able to see that b*tch."

Now, Zephyr Talent in Austin, Texas says they've seen enough -- and have decided to DROP Aaryn from the agency because of her filthy mouth.

"Aaryn, season 15 cast member of Big Brother, revealed prejudices and other beliefs that we (Zephyr Talent) do not condone."

Zephyr continues, " We certainly find the statements made by Aaryn on the live Internet feed to be offensive. Upon much consideration, we have decided to release Aaryn from her contract with Zephyr Talent."