Kids

Eddie Murphy is on the attack against a comedian who has not-so-subtly insinuated Eddie is his daddy.

Eddie's lawyer fired off several threatening letters to Brando Murphy, claiming the comedian has all but advertised on a sandwich board that he's Eddie's offspring. In one letter -- obtained by TMZ -- Eddie's lawyer, legal pit bull Marty Singer, threatens to sue him for millions if he doesn't back off.

According to the letters, these are some of the things Brando has done:

-- Changed his last name to Murphy
-- Performing with Richard Pryor's son, Mason, in the "Sons of Comedy" tour.
-- Showing up at the Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf Eddie frequents and screaming, "My father won't talk to me!"

Brando is not backing down, sending his own threatening letter to Eddie, insisting he's never presented himself as Eddie's son and calling Eddie's accusations "vile, base, contemptible, miserable, wretched and loathsome."

Brando says he'll sue Eddie for defamation if he continues what he calls a campaign of intimidation.

"Dance Moms" star Kelly Hyland has been legally FORBIDDEN from having any contact with co-star Abby Lee Miller after a nasty catfight ... which means they can't even tweet each other, TMZ has learned.

Hyland was in court this morning in NYC facing assault and harassment charges after allegedly attacking Miller -- who owns and runs the dance studio -- in a fit of jealousy back in November.

As we previously reported, sources tell us the two women had a hair-pulling brawl at the dance studio after Kelly accused Abby of slighting her young daughters.

Both women showed up at the courthouse this morning ... and so did a camera from Lifetime ... 'cause you KNOW this is going to be part of the TV show.

During the hearing, Hyland was ordered by the judge to stay away from Miller while the case is pending ... which means no talking, no phone calls and NO TWEETING at her.

#drama.

12:30 P.M. PT -- Outside court, Miller vented for the cameras ... accusing Hyland of playing a dumb blonde to get attention.

Shayne Lamas -- who decided to marry her hubby HOURS after meeting him at a drunken pool party -- is re-writing all the rules of marriage ... 'cause not only is she still with the dude ... they're still HAVING SEX.

We know that ... because sources close to Shayne tell us she's pregnant again.

We told you their story ... Shayne is a former winner of "The Bachelor" who fell in love with TheDirty.com founder Nik Richie 4 years ago at a wild Vegas pool party ... and hours later decided to get hitched.

NO ONE expected it to last. But Shayne and Nik are still going strong ... they have a 2-year-old daughter named Press -- and now we're told Shayne's 16 weeks pregnant with their 2nd baby.

Madonna says she had no idea people would take such offense over her use of the n-word yesterday -- even though at 55 she probably should.

Madge released a statement moments ago saying she's not a racist ... and her use of the hashtag "#disni**a" in reference to her son on Instagram Friday was not meant as a racial slur.

Madonna explains, "There's no way to defend the use of the word. It was all about intention ... It was used as a term of endearment toward my son who is white."

Madonna adds, "I appreciate that it's a provocative word and I apologize if it gave people the wrong impression. Forgive me."

Madonna has a strange way of bragging about her son -- she posted a pic of him boxing with the hashtag ... "disni**a" ... and she immediately got blasted for it.

Madonna posted the photo of Rocco Ritchie on Instagram Friday night with the caption, "No one messes with Dirty Soap! Mama said knock you out! #disni**a."

Dirty Soap is clearly a nickname for Rocco. As for the hashtag -- who the Hell knows?

Some outraged followers ripped her for it ... with comments like, "MADONNA U NEED TO TAKE UR arthritis medicine instead of trying to be hip on the internet."

#truth.

Jon Gosselin says he felt TERRIBLE for his daughters for having to appear on the "Today" show with Kate this morning ... telling TMZ the whole thing was "horrible" to watch.

Gosselin appeared on "TMZ Live" moments ago and said Kate's humiliating meltdown on live TV this morning shows exactly why the kids shouldn't be forced to participate in a lengthy publicity tour with their mother.

"I’m going to handle this as a family matter," Jon said ... adding, "I don’t want to affect the children anymore."

Honey Boo Boo is mysteriously bailing on public appearances ... and we know the reason -- a smashed Pumpkin.

Boo Boo was a no-show this morning on "GMA" and we're told she won't show up at Katie Couric's show either.

Turns out the kid's family ties are more important than mugging for a camera. She's been spending time in the hospital with big sis Pumpkin, who was badly hurt in the family car accident last week. Pumpkin suffered severe chest bruises, a concussion and weakness in her legs.

She can be annoying, but she's a good sister.

Tiger Woods' maiden mistress Rachel Uchitel is now free to bang whomever she pleases ... because we've learned she's officially single again.

TMZ has learned ... her divorce from Matt Hahn was made final on Monday. The couple got married in 2011 and have a daughter. Their break-up was nuclear. Matt -- a former football star at Penn State and now a finance guy -- said he was the victim of cruel and inhumane treatment but ultimately backed off the claim.

We're told Uchitel got primary physical custody of daughter Wyatt and Hahn gets visitation.

On the financial front -- no money is changing hands. We're told there's a prenup that handles everything, and neither will get spousal support.

You've been warned, Lindsey Vonn.

A 34-year-old mom who appeared on the TLC reality show "Cheer Perfection" has been arrested on suspicion of raping a boy under 14 years of age.

Andrea Clevenger -- Kylie's mom on the show -- turned herself in to authorities in Sherwood, Arkansas this morning after two felony warrants were issued for her arrest: one for rape, and one for engaging children in sexually explicit conduct for use in a visual or print medium.

Based on legal docs obtained by TMZ ... the boy was 13. He claims he was in Clevenger's home when she had him remove his pants. He says she climbed on top of him and had sex with him, and he claims he ejaculated in her mouth.

The boy also claims he had oral sex with Clevenger in her car on 2 occasions and they texted sexually explicit pics to each other.

According to docs, the parents saw the pics and called authorities in November.

Clevenger -- the same mom who once suggested treating a flat-iron burn with her own urine -- has been released on bond ... but has to wear a GPS monitoring device.

TLC had no comment.

Safety first ... is not exactly a priority for Gisele Bundchen, who took her 1-year-old daughter on an ATV ride yesterday in Costa Rica -- without a helmet.

Gisele wasn't doing wheelies or anything, but it's still pretty dangerous, considering she was driving one-handed and holding on to her baby daughter Vivian Lake with the other.

For the record, it's illegal to ride an ATV on public land in Costa Rica without a helmet. Gisele's driving down to the beach, but it's unclear if the beach is private.

9:45 AM PT -- Mia Farrow -- who was silent last night about the Woody tribute -- just posted this message, "A woman has publicly detailed Woody Allen's molestation of her at age 7. GoldenGlobe tribute showed contempt for her & all abuse survivors."

Woody Allen's biological son thinks Diane Keaton's fawning acceptance of the Cecil B. DeMille Lifetime Achievement Award on Woody's behalf lacked one material fact -- that he allegedly fondled his 7-year-old adopted daughter.

Ronan Farrow -- who's mother Mia Farrow split from Woody after she learned he was having an affair with her adopted daughter Soon-Yi -- tweeted this after Keaton's speech at the Golden Globes:

"Missed the Woody Allen tribute -- did they put the part where a woman publicly confirmed he molested her at age 7 before or after Annie Hall?"

Allen's adopted daughter Dylan claimed when she was 7 Allen touched her inappropriately.

Allen through his lawyer -- has previously denied doing anything inappropriate with Dylan.

A few times she's been around this track ... but she ain't no pregnant fat girl, she ain't no pregnant fat girl!

Gwen Stefani stepped out for lunch Friday in Beverly Hills at Mr. Chow ... and despite being several months pregnant -- with her third chld -- the singer still looked extremely do-able.

Hey baby, hey baby.

Hilary Duff and ex-NHL star Mike Comrie have just announced they've separated ... and it's pretty obvious divorce is just a matter of time.

The couple says they "have mutually decided to an amicable separation" and will "remain best friends and will continue to be in each other's lives."

26-year-old Duff and 33-year-old Comrie were married in Aug. 2010 in Santa Barbara ... and Hilary gave birth to a baby boy, Luca, March 20, 2012.

Hilary's mom, Susan Duff, tells TMZ, the couple has already decided on joint custody of Luca. Susan says she loves Mike but sees the breakup this way, "They're better friends than a married couple."

A rep for the couple says they are dedicated to parenting their son together.

Hilary just tweeted saying, "Mike and I are sitting here, we are so appreciative for all of your kindness & well wishes."

She continued, "Not an easy day but we're getting thru it together."

Hilary and Mike were most recently spotted together on New Year's Eve.

The youngest child on the new Disney sitcom "Girl Meets World" makes WAY more money than you ... $8,000 a week to be exact ... and he's only 6 years old.

According to the minor contract for August Maturo -- who plays the youngest son of Cory and Topanga on the show -- the child actor is set to earn $8,000 per episode (one a week) for the first season of the show.

If the show is approved for additional seasons, he's set to earn even more -- up to $9,261 per episode by Season 4. Pretty sweet.

It obviously pays to be one of the main characters ... we got the minor contract for another kid on the show (who plays the daughter's love interest) and he's only set to make about $4,800 an episode.

DMX says American cops are a bunch of d**k-sucking losers who go after him because he's famous.

X -- who's been busted more times than a cheap watch -- unloaded from the relative safety of Bulgaria, where he was scheduled to perform last weekend.

The rapper only recently regained his right to travel outside the U.S. -- his passport had been yanked because he owed a huge amount in back child support.

But he's gotta come back to the U.S. sometime ... and the cops here ain't gonna like this one bit.

Beyonce and Jay Z celebrated Blue Ivy's 2nd birthday in spectacular fashion ... closing down an entire theme park -- for a celebration that the kid will never remember.

Blue Ivy spent the day Tuesday with lemurs, orangutans, kangaroos and penguins at Jungle Island -- a wildlife park and botanical garden in Miami.

Park officials are keeping the cost under wraps ... but it's gotta be pricey to close the entire park. Put it this way ... a VIP safari tour for just one person costs $240.