Hook Ups

Ryan Seacrest still has the Midas touch ... 'cause his sexy new rebound chick just inked a deal with one of the biggest modeling agencies on the planet.

TMZ has learned Shayna Taylor -- a.k.a. Ryan's hot new blonde -- signed a 2-year deal with Wilhelmina Models yesterday.

We're told Shayna's Instagram BLEW UP with new followers following the Thanksgiving holiday she spent with Ryan and his family in Argentina ... and the modeling agency took notice.

Plus, she's really hot.

A rep for Wilhemina tells us they believe Shayna has "huge potential in the fitness and lifestyle world."

Shayna is publicly saying she and Ryan are just friends -- but, c'mon ... what kind of friends travel around the world together with Seacrest's parents.

Lindsay Lohan is practicing the safest kind of sex -- NONE -- because she's too busy focusing on her career to worry about boys ... sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ.

According to sources, Lindsay's laughing off reports she's hooking up with Liam Neeson's 18-year-old son, Michael ... claiming they're only friends and have been for quite a while.

In fact, sources tell us, Lindsay hasn't been dating ANY of the people she's been reportedly seeing recently, including male models Morgan O'Connor (a friend of a friend) and Liam Dean (whom she met on a photo shoot).

Ryan Seacrest is more predictable than crap in a diaper -- the "American Idol" host has a new lady in his sights after dumping Julianne Hough ... and shocker, she's also a hot blonde.

The girl's name is Shayna Taylor ... she's 23 ... annnnd that's pretty much it.

According to our sources, Shayna runs in one of those hot blonde Hollywood crowds filled with Instagram models who pretty much party exclusively at rich people's houses. And that's how Seacrest met her roughly a year ago.

It's unclear if Ryan and Shayna are boyfriend and girlfriend ... or just "close" friends.

Fun fact: Shayna's the same girl who was pictured smooching with Terrence Howard last year in St. Barts.

So now we gotta ask ...

Charlie Sheen is wishing DEATH upon two of his former "Angels" -- claiming they scammed him out of some serious cash ... and now he wants 'em to "fatally choke on a Vons can of pressed turkey."

TMZ has learned ... before Sheen started dating Brett Rossi, he ended his relationship with the trio of porn stars he had been with for the past several months -- Celeste Star, Jayme Langford and Jana Jordan.

Sources connected to Sheen tell us Charlie believes two of the three "angels" -- Jayme and Jana -- carried out a scheme to run up his credit card bill ... and when Charlie found out, he went ballistic.

In fact, when we reached out to Charlie about the situation -- he fired-off one of the most Sheen-ish statements of all time ... telling us, "I've observed more nobility and honor in the drifters I've run over and child molesters I spit on at Pelican Bay."

It gets worse -- and far more graphic -- at one point he says they're worse than "the cancer known as Brooke [Mueller]."

Check out the entire statement below ... it's epic.

Pauly D better learn to duck and cover ... 'cause his baby mama had no qualms about beating the crap out of another guy who knocked her up ... according to police records obtained by TMZ.

We've learned ... Amanda Markert was arrested in July 2009 for opening a can of whoopass on her first baby daddy -- Lance Gerbino -- leaving him with bloody lips, a nasty gash above his eye and injuries inside his mouth.

Gerbino tells TMZ ... Amanda had been out drinking with friends ... and was pissed because she had to come home to help take care of their infant son.

He claims Markert just started "going crazy" ... wailing on his face with her fists while she was holding their son. Gerbino felt the baby was in danger ... and that's why he called police.

According to police records, Markert turned herself in to cops --booked under her legal name, Amareda Markert -- but the assault charge was eventually dismissed after she completed an anger management course.

As we've reported, Markert and Pauly D are involved in an ugly custody fight over their 6-month old daughter, Amabella ... and they've both been very clear about how much they hate each other.

We contacted Amanda for comment on the domestic violence case ... she hung up on us.

Bruce and Kris Jenner aren't completely out of each other's hair after officially separating in October ... in fact, the two met up for some smoochie time over Thanksgiving weekend ... and Bruce ponied up big time.

As we reported, Bruce and Kris announced they were living in separate homes (Bruce in Malibu and Kris in Calabasas) and they're both happier that way. But they still came together for Thanksgiving.

The photo was snapped Friday after Bruce, Kris, Kris' mom, Kourtney, and Bruce's ponytail all took in a movie at the theater in Calabasas. When they parted ways, Kris gave Bruce a parting kiss on the cheek.

Seems Charlie Sheen has a brand new girlfriend ... 'cause the Warlock was open-mouth kissing a hardcore porn star over Thanksgiving weekend ... and it looks like it was more than just a hookup.

The porn star on the receiving end is 24-year-old Brett Rossi -- star of such flicks as "She Loves My Big Breasts 2" and "Bondage Tongue Bath."

The two were spotted swapping spit in Cabo a few days ago. We're told they met in L.A. last month and Charlie took her to Mexico to celebrate Thanksgiving with a few other friends.

Rossi's the classy kind of porn star too -- as far as we can tell, she doesn't really do hardcore male-female sex scenes ... mostly just solo and girl-girl stuff with the likes of Twistys and Penthouse.

As for the other women in Charlie's life -- you know, the three "Angels" he's dating -- we're told Charlie's still with them, too.

The more, the merrier.

Max George's girlfriend is truly a multi-tasker ... she can PDA and pick the thong out of her ass AT THE SAME TIME!!!!

Max -- the guy from The Wanted who once banged Lindsay Lohan -- took his hot model GF Nina Agdal to a beach vacation in the Bahamas ... where they galavanted around with their ridiculously attractive tan bodies.

They spearfished ... they yachted ... they boozed -- and most importantly, they documented almost the entire thing on camera so everyone could follow their half-naked vacay.

Sharing is caring.

“Real Housewives of Atlanta” star Phaedra Parks' husband -- Apollo Nida -- definitely didn't text Kenya Moore for sex last year ... 'cause he tells TMZ, he just wanted to talk business.

"Sextgate" started on last seasons' 'RHOA' reunion show ... when Kenya implied Apollo was sending her inappropriate text messages after they apparently ran into each other in L.A.

But Moore and Apollo have both denied any wrongdoing since then ... and now Nida claims he only struck up the convo to propose that the two collaborate on a workout tape.

The tandem workout DVD never got off the ground ... 'cause Phaedra put the kibosh on the joint venture before Nida ever had a chance to make his proposal.

Dr. Dre's attack against a big website may have backfired ... the attorney for TheDirty.com fired off a letter to Dre saying what a big fan he is ... and then lumping the legendary rapper in with the likes of OJ Simpson.

It's actually pretty hysterical. A post on TheDirty claimed Dre -- who is married -- has been hooking up with a big booty video vixen.

Dre's lawyer fired off a letter to TheDirty, and we've obtained the response from the website's lawyer, and it's priceless.

David Gingras, Esq., begins by saying, "Back in the '80s I personally destroyed many subwoofers blasting N.W.A.'s 'F**k Tha Police' in my car in the high school parking lot."

Gingras goes on to say what a fan he is ... and then goes on a very sarcastic attack.

First, the lawyer challenges Dre's claim that the story is false: "Bill Clinton and Monica what's-her-name both denied having sexual relations. Of course, they were both lying. Same thing with Lance Armstrong." And then he jokes, "Other than O.J. Simpson, who was clearly framed, history is filled with examples of people who make mistakes and lie about them to cover it up."

The hired gun goes on and on, making jokes about people in Eastern Kentucky -- "cue banjo music," trashing a court decision from that region that makes it seem Dre has a case. The lawyer wrote, "If you believe the Kentucky court's decision [it's compelling] ... I also have a fabulous ocean-front unicorn ranch here in Arizona that you might want to buy."

Bottom line -- TheDirty's lawyer says the posts in question were comments from users, and the website isn't responsible.

Too $hort won't be out hunting for deals on Black Friday ... but he might be out hunting for white girls to bang ... 'cause the rapper tells TMZ, it's all part of his own special holiday tradition.

Too $hort was arriving at Bootsy Bellows ... and he told us the true meaning of Black Friday: the night all the white girls date the black guys.

A guy selling a Lexus on eBay is banking on you paying more because Leo DiCaprio cavorted with Gisele Bundchen and other models in the whip.

A guy named Brian bought the 1999 Lexus GS 400 at a dealership. The paperwork showed Leo was the prior owner who turned it in after the lease expired.

Brian bought the car in 2001 with 18,000 miles. He's selling it today with 148,091 miles, and you can buy it now for $20,000.

So how can he command such a price? Brian tells TMZ ... the former service manager at the Beverly Hills dealership told him Gisele was a passenger in the car several times when Leo dropped it off for service.

In other words ... sniffing the seat comes at a premium.

Here's the bad news for Brian ... The stale scent of a woman doesn't command lots of cents -- top bid so far is $5,000.

If anyone's gonna have sex with Babyface's ex-wife, the legendary music producer is glad it's Deion Sanders.

Kenny "Babyface" Edmonds -- who divorced ex-wife Tracey Edmonds in 2005 -- recently sat for an interview with Oprah, and explained how Tracey's new BF Deion approached him for a man-to-man talk to make sure they had no problems with each other.

Babyface says he was blown away by Deion's classy move to clear the air ... and is totally at peace with Tracey's new relationship. Check the clip.

Babyface has been catching some flack for the interview -- he said he wasn't "in love" with Tracey towards the end of their marriage. But he tells TMZ, his words are being twisted. Babyface says he never stopped loving Tracey ... their love just changed from love-love to friend-love.

"Real Housewives of Atlanta" star Kenya Moore says she's no sext-messaging slut hooking up with Phaedra Parks' husband ... and thinks he spun the whole lie just for attention on the show..

Parks' husband Apollo Nida claims Kenya had sexted him while they were both in L.A. last year ... and proposed a face-to-face hook up too.

Last night on 'RHOA' ... Nida said Kenya "wanted to f**k, ok, she wanted to have sex in L.A." ... although he denies anything ever happened.

Moore tells TMZ she and Nida did text each other -- but there was nothing sexual, and they never met up. She gave us screen shots of what she claims was their text convo last October.

Dr. Dre is a loving, monogamous husband who NEVER cheated on his wife with a big booty video vixen … this according to Dre’s VERY threatening lawyers.

The Doc’s legal team fired off a cease and desist letter -- obtained by TMZ -- to TheDirty.com ... demanding it remove blog posts claiming Dre is plotting to leave his wife for model Kili Anderson.

The website even posted pics of a house they supposedly screwed in together, and a huge ring Dre allegedly gave her.

The Good Doctor says the stories are B.S. and he's demanding The Dirty immediately 86 the posts and apologize ... or else.

Lamar Odom's drug problem is only getting worse -- at least that's how it looks in this video, shot this month and obtained by TMZ, showing Lamar incoherently rapping without his shirt on ... talking about drugs, making money without the NBA, and cheating on Khloe Kardashian.

Lamar appears out of it, rapping about making money off his fragrance "Unbreakable," and how he smokes drugs to make "the pain go away." He even drops Kanye's name.

But the crazy part -- Lamar raps, "And when Khloe's out of town / I still be on the DL." His friend then follows up, "You know what it is / We the QU [Queens] pimps / Ask any of these shorties / We ran through their cribs."

Translation: when Khloe's away, Lamar will play.

As we reported, Lamar's currently training hard in Rhode Island, trying to get his ass back in shape for the NBA -- but drugs are still obviously a big part of his life.