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A wobbly Jessica Simpson hit up Warwick nightclub in Hollywood Sunday night, but from the looks of it ... she did plenty of partying beforehand -- and even had to make a 911 call for fast food to soak up the booze.

Simpson was accompanied by Eric Johnson and it's a good thing he was there ... because somebody had to make sure she didn't fall flat on her face!

Mrs. Weight Watchers -- who did look AMAZING -- had a hard time making her way in and out and definitely seemed to have a hard time answering fairly simple questions. Best part of the video ... the driver making a Jack in the Box run for Jessica WHILE she was in the club!

Heidi and Spencer Pratt are finally splitting up ... briefly, anyway ... because they are taking part in "Celebrity Wife Swap" and taking home a nice check for it too.

According to our sources, the O.G. most hated couple of reality TV shot an episode that airs next week -- and they'll be swapping with seven-time Olympic medalist Amanda Beard and her husband.

Our sources say the Pratts took home $50,000 for the gig ... which we know is nearly $20,000 more than some other celeb couples have been paid.

Where's Superman when you need him? Joey Fatone's famed "MTV Cribs" house -- the one with an entire room dedicated to the Man of Steel -- has allegedly been hit by a few NINJA BURGLARS ... but police arrested the suspects before any real damage was done.

A rep for the Orange County Sheriff's Office in FL tells TMZ, the three suspects were arrested Monday evening outside the 12,300 square foot 6-bedroom mansion ... after cutting through the fence.

Police say the men were dressed in all black ninja-type outfits and were carrying backpacks containing zip ties, duct tape, and handguns. According to police, one of the suspects fled and hid in nearby bushes ... but was quickly sniffed out by a K-9.

Cops believe the burglars are the same perps who burglarized a nearby home last month ... also dressed as ninjas. That break-in was caught on tape (above).

Either way, the ninjas ain't Fatone's problem -- he sold the house in 2011 ... for $3.9 million.

Giving booze to a bunch of horny kids living in the American wilderness sounds like a pretty bad idea ... unless it's for the Alaskan reality show "Slednecks" ... which struck gold when a CRAZY brawl broke out during a party scene.

Production sources tell us ... "Slednecks" (which used to be called "Buckwild") staged the party inside a barn that doubled for a rickety nightclub. There was lotsa liquor for the cast and a bunch of yocals.

Chanel West Coast from MTV’s ‘Ridiculousness’ gave us some freestyle rhymes that were so tight ... we almost overlooked her pretend bodyguard getting really, really knocked out.

But you gotta see C-Dubs' reaction ... it is awesome and hysterical! She's definitely gonna need a new bodyguard though.

Move over, Sarah Palin ... the folks at "Buckwild" are coming back to MTV for season 2 and TMZ has learned they are shooting in the former Alaska governor's backyard.

As TMZ first reported, "Buckwild" was cancelled by MTV last year after the death of one of the cast members, Shain Gandee. Producers of the show maintained at the time they were going forward with season two.

Now sources tell TMZ the show has been shooting for about a month now in Wasilla, Alaska with a whole new cast. Our sources say the concept is the same as before -- lots of hooking up and fights -- but with some insane new stunts.

We're told they've already shot the cast skinny dipping in freezing cold water during an ice fishing trip ... and a crazy snowmobile ride through the mountains, with people being pulled on inner tubes. Our sources say the stunts being shot now may or may not make the final edit.

Take some deep breaths and try not to panic because the 2014 MTV Movie Awards are just hours away -- but before they smack you in the face with this year's hottest looks -- take a magical trip back in time and check out all of the looks from last year's fashion photos.

Incubus singer Brandon Boyd has been ruthlessly stalking a former "Real World" star -- even threatening to kill her -- so says the former "Real World" star ... but Brandon says B.S.

Svetlana Shusterman from "Real World 17: Key West" got a temporary restraining order against Boyd, claiming Brandon's been stalking her for years ... and recently began threatening her life.

Svetlana filed a police report claiming Brandon had followed her car onto a freeway and yelled through the window that he was going to kill her.

Svetlana says she recently moved to a friends house to evade him, but he tracked her down. She writes, "Every day, I am terrified."

Boyd has been ordered to stay 100 yards away from her pending a court hearing next month.

It's the question millions of couples ask themselves before entering the delivery room -- and now Jay Cutler's in the same boat -- does your wife want you to see EVERYTHING when she's giving birth?

Fortunately for the Chicago Bears QB -- he won't have to guess ... 'cause his wife Kristin Cavallari was out in NYC today and told us.

Steve-O's latest stunt -- backflipping from a bridge into the shallow, San Antonio River -- could land him in jail for the crime of "Deadly Conduct."

Steve made the jump last Friday ... a very risky proposition given the water below is only 4' deep.

Cops threatened to cite him but didn't ... however, law enforcement sources now tell us the "Jackass" star is under criminal investigation.

So, you ask, what is the crime of "Deadly Conduct." Under Texas law, someone who engages in reckless conduct that could place someone else in danger of great bodily injury, then it's considered deadly conduct ... a misdemeanor punishable by up to a year in jail.

Steve-O insists police should be THANKING him for doing a high-flying backflip off a San Antonio bridge this weekend -- into four feet of water -- telling TMZ, thanks to him, the entire city now knows ... that bridge should really have "no diving" signs on it.

San Antonio police are currently investigating the incident -- a rep for the SAPD tells us, they're trying to determine how Steve-O should be punished ... because backflipping off that bridge isn't just illegal, it's extremely dangerous.

But Steve-O says that's BS -- telling us, it's dangerous because the city never posted signs on the bridge, warning people that the water below is only 4 feet deep.

He adds, "They've given no indication that people shouldn't jump, and done nothing to warn anyone about the serious dangers of that shallow water. Very irresponsible, indeed."

The Mission: Boxing legend Bernard Hopkins wanted to take a stab at being a TMZ paparazzi on the streets of NYC today.

The Target: MTV star Kristin Cavallari ... who also happens to be married to Chicago Bears QB Jay Cutler.

The Result: Bernard started off strong ... but things fizzled pretty quickly when it became clear Kristin had no idea who he was.

The Best Part: Bernard's post-shoot analysis ... where he talks about his paparazzi strengths and weaknesses ... and reminds us that Kristin's smokin' hot.

Dan Cortese and Bill Bellamy are BRINGING "ROCK N' JOCK" BACK ... well, at least that's the plan according to Dan.

TMZ Sports spoke with the former MTV star who tells us he and Bill Bellamy are officially trying to get the franchise back on the air ... but Dan says there's just one catch.

FYI -- RNJ was HUUUGE back in the day ... with Dan and Bill scoring big stars like George Clooney to mix with music stars, athletes and other celebs for A-list softball, basketball and even football games.

So, which stars are Dan and Bill hoping to land for the show this time around?

Watch the clip -- it ain't Justin Bieber ... that's for damn sure.

The cat fights are now spilling into court -- a pair of female producers are suing the people behind "Love & Hip Hop" ... claiming the reality show was their idea first ... and VH1 stole it.

Trisha Lum and Nickie Lum-Davis filed the suit against VH1 and MTV -- claiming they pitched the idea back in 2009 ... and thought they had a deal to make their show, called "Hip Hop Wives."

According to the lawsuit ... the show was supposed to star current and former flames of DMX, Swizz Beatz, Irv Gotti and Jim Jones ... but VH1 honchos cooled on the idea ... saying they didn't want a show that would compete with its other reality series, "Basketball Wives."

The Lums are calling BS ... saying VH1 moguls used "Hip Hop Wives" as the template for "Love and Hip Hop" ... down to the last detail.

Trisha and Nickie want justice ... in the form of money. Their lawyer tells us they're gunning for an 8-figure judgment.

"iCarly" star Jennette McCurdy is nothin' but a "ratchet ho" who played NBA star Andre Drummond like a fiddle to boost her own celebrity status ... so says MTV star Charlamagne tha God.

Charlamagne -- who stars on "Guy Code" and "Charlamagne & Friends" -- tells TMZ Sports ... the "ratchet ho" proof is in the fact that she publicly engaged Andre on Twitter after he named her as his "Woman Crush Wednesday."

"She’s clearly a ratchet ho ... social sexual networking hookups are for regular people not celebrities."

Charlamagne also says he believes Drummond when the NBA star sad he didn't leak racy pics of Jennette to the internet -- even after she trashed him and humiliated him on a podcast this weekend.

"I bet ten other guys have the same pics Andre has," Charlamagne says ... "She’s an idiot."

For all you non-urban linguists out there -- Urban Dictionary defines "Ratchet Ho" as, "A female lacking class and integrity. Pertaining to women with weak moral foundations that generally are characterized by their general antagonism towards people; slut; degenerate."

And now you know.

One thing is undeniable ... Audrina Patridge is pretty ... out of tune when it comes to singing -- but that didn't stop her from rocking a legendary stage in Las Vegas this weekend.

The former "Hills" star went to Rock n' Roll Fantasy Camp at the House of Blues in Vegas and got to perform an original song with actual rockstar, Lita Ford.

It's unclear how many days Audrina spent at the camp -- but she obviously spent more time on her rocker chick moves (decent) than anything else.

Hey, at least she's living her dreams. Off key, but still ...

For the record, AP ... here's how it's done. Classic Lita.