You Might Want to Rethink

Columbus Short seems to be making it clear ... he will NOT come back to the U.S. to fight his multiple criminal cases -- and he is thumbing his nose at the United States justice system.

Columbus was in Barbados yesterday when he told the crowd he's packing his bags and moving there for good ... Mind you, there's an active arrest warrant after he failed to show earlier this week in his domestic case.

Columbus has had 4 run-ins with the law in the last 5 months ... and aggressively spoke about his disdain for the people who are accusing him of wrongdoing.

Lacey Wildd -- the reality TV star who recently underwent her 36th plastic surgery -- squeezed herself into a pink bikini Friday on a beach in Florida.

Wildd is a 46-year-old mother of six (let that sink in) and has had 12 boob jobs alone ... going from an A-cup to the ridiculous LLL-cups she flaunted today.

She's been on TLC's "My Strange Addiction" and is set to appear on the new E! series "Botched."

As far as those shows are concerned, Wildd's a natural.

"Ice Road Truckers" star Tim Zickuhr is clearly a guy who cares about his hair ... his fetish for follicles got him arrested ... and it's only the 2nd weirdest thing he was busted for this year.

Cops tell us ... they responded to a disturbance call earlier this month at a pet hotel in San Dimas ... and found a drunken Zickuhr arguing with an employee and demanding they pony up his pooch. Turns out he doesn't even have a dog.

Cops couldn't help but notice Zickuhr had a shopping cart ... filled with Rogaine, hair straightener, shampoo, a hairbrush and an assortment of booze. Police were understandably suspicious because the errant items were laying in the Albertson's cart -- no bag, no receipt.

Police went to the nearby grocery store, determined he stole the items and arrested him for shoplifting. Zickuhr spent 3 days in the pokey.

The arrest still doesn't compare to Tim's arrest back in April -- allegedly involving a hooker, kidnapping and waterboarding. Maybe let Tim tell it ...

Bryan Singer -- who has been all but vindicated in a lawsuit accusing him of sexual molestation -- had an interesting choice of movies he favors.

The "X-Men" director was at LAX Thursday where he dodged questions about the recent allegations, but did get a little chatty when asked about his favorite movies.

Given all he's going through ... he probably could have picked a different favorite director. You see where we're going here ...

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr are still tied together ... by the people they appear to have dated. It's a bizarre love square. Let us connect the dots.

-- Orlando has been getting cozy in the last few days on a boat in Ibiza with a woman named Erica Packer
-- Erica was married to media mogul/billionaire James Packer
-- James and Erica separated in September 2013
-- Orlando and Miranda separated in October 2013
-- Overseas media reported in December ... James was romantically linked to Miranda. It's interesting, because all 4 of them were friends while the marriages were in tact.
-- James and his best friend, David Gyngell, got in a fistfight in May ... during which David confronted James about his treatment of Erica ... and Miranda was mentioned

And get this ... both James and David were fined $500 each for bad behavior.

Orlando should be fined $1000 for throwing a wimpy punch.

This picture may be enough to put Columbus Short behind bars.

Short chose the Caribbean over court Wednesday. He had been ordered to appear before a judge in his domestic violence case but was a no show. The judge issued an arrest warrant.

Lo and behold ... Columbus was living large at a festival called Fantasy Barbados ... a Mardi-Gras-like celebration.

Nation News on the island got what could be the smoking gun for the judge ... surely enough to throw the book at the former "Scandal" star.

Shaquille O'Neal and rapper Waka Flocka Flame just got hit with lawsuits for reposting a photo of a man with a rare disorder and mocking his appearance.

Jahmel Binion posted a selfie back in April which Shaq and Waka eventually reposted with mean-spirited captions ... clearly making fun of his face.

Jahmel suffers from a disorder called hypohidrotic ectodermal dysplasia -- it causes limited hair growth, missing teeth, and facial deformities.

As we reported ... once Shaq found out about Jahmel's condition he took down the post, got in touch with Jahmel and apologized. He tweeted ... "Made a new friend today when I called and apologized to Jahmel Binion. Great dude. #alwayslearning #MYBADCUZ."

Jahmel has now filed a defamation suit against Shaq, Waka, and Utah Jazz guard Trey Burke -- who allegedly threw in his own insults over social media. The lawsuit points out that more than 8.4 million people saw the insults.

Miguel says he took a sun-drenched ride along the So Cal coast 2 weeks ago on his Harley ... which sounds awesome, except for the fact that his probation prohibits it.

Miguel posted a pic of him on the hog with the caption, "Rode down the coast to PV today ... #holdtight #artgang #harleydavidson."

The singer is on probation for a DUI conviction in February. He was to drive ONLY with an interlock device -- where you blow into a tube which then allows the vehicle to start, but only if you're alcohol-free.

We're told there's no interlock on his Harley.

An official in the L.A. City Attorney's office tells TMZ ... the post alone is not sufficient to trigger a probation violation, because it doesn't catch him in the act of driving. The official warns ... they're on the lookout.

Tim McGraw was incited by the woman he slapped ... because we've obtained new video showing she repeatedly smacked him on the ass before he reached his breaking point.

TMZ broke the story ... Tim bitch slapped a fan at an Atlanta concert earlier this month ... after she got handsy and tore his already-ripped jeans. Tim's problem -- he had shooed her hand away, and even hesitated before walloping her. She's hired a lawyer and apparently wants money ... or else.

But the new video shows Jesslyn Taylor aggressively whacked Tim's ass 5 times before the slapping incident.

We reached out to Jesslyn's attorney ... so far no word back.

Reps for Tim had no comment.

"Sharknado 2" star Tara Reid is no scientist, but she wants to clarify -- she has enough depth of knowledge about the deep to know a sharknado assault is fiction.

Reid was shocked when her GQ quote -- that sharknado attacks are "very rare" -- got taken seriously ... as if she believed it.

Justin Bieber has declared Instagram war on Orlando Bloom ... with a pic of the Brit dissolving into tears.

It's Bieber's second Instagram salvo ... hours after Orlando took a swing at him at Cipriani restaurant in Ibiza he posted a sexy pic of Miranda Kerr and then quickly took it down.

Miranda -- the Helen of Troy in this war -- was the trigger for the bar scuffle. It's clear Orlando felt Justin was banging her while they were still man and wife.

We'd say there's no use crying over Miranda, but then again ...

Morrissey wanted to turn his security guard into a thug ... to hurt a fan he despised, and the singer's manager wanted the guy killed ... so claims the bodyguard in a new lawsuit.

Bradley Steyn claims Morrissey begged him to become his hired muscle ... after a San Jose show where he was bum rushed on stage by fans.

Steyn signed on ... but claims it quickly became apparent Morrissey had more diabolical plans.

According to Steyn ... Morrissey hated the guy who ran one of his fan websites -- Morrissey-solo.com -- which he felt invaded his personal life. Steyn claims in the suit Morrissey asked if there was a way the fan "could get hurt."

Steyn claims right in front of Morrissey ... the tour manager asked if the fan "could be gotten rid of." Then they discussed how to get the fan's home address.

Steyn says in the suit he rejected the overture ... and got fired the next day.

We tried getting in touch with Morrissey ... so far, no luck.

Kim Kardashian and step-bro Brandon Jenner had an illicit make-out session ... so intimated Brody Jenner, but in reality we've learned there's less here than meets the eye.

Our Kardashian archival sources tell us ... the "kiss" went down when Kim was around 11 and Brandon was 12. Fact is ... Kris and Bruce weren't even married at the time, but they were dating.

The kiss was part of a Truth or Dare game, and it was more like a peck on the lips.

Wow ... Kim learned a lot since she was 11.

The sister of "Big Brother" contestant Jocasta Odom is tearing cast member Frankie Grande to shreds ... for saying Jocasta "can kill herself."

Frankie's back stab stung hard ... because Jocasta -- a pastor -- just performed a memorial service for his recently deceased grandfather.

Maranda Chelsea, Jocasta's sis, tells TMZ, "It was an ignorant statement and the little respect I had for him just went out the window." And the parting shot, "It shows the lack of maturity he has."

Miranda isn't the only one pissed off -- so are the fans ... @JrAguja1997 tweeted "I don't f**king care if your sister sings good, you're a s**tty person Frankie. Calling Jocasta to kill herself. Argh."

The twins born more than a year ago to David Tutera and ex-partner Ryan Jurica have never met.

As TMZ previously reported, Tutera and Jurica each fertilized an egg that was implanted in the same surrogate, who gave birth to the two babies at the same time. David and Ryan split before birth ... David kept the girl, Cielo, and Ryan kept the boy, Cedric.

David -- who hosts CELEBrations on WE tv -- told Harvey and Charles on "TMZ Live" ... the kids have had zero contact because of the nuclear breakup.

Ryan tells TMZ ... he's attempted to create a relationship between the twins, but David would have none of it. Ryan says he thinks the kids need to establish a bond sooner than later, and, "I will do all that I can to foster it."

David hedged on "TMZ LIve," saying he's open to the kids connecting one day.

Kandi Burruss' backstage demands are HILARIOUS ... whatever you do, don't screw with her Popeyes fried chicken!

TMZ has obtained a copy of Burruss' contract rider ... listing her demands for the touring production of her musical show, "A Mother's Love" ... and she's VERY picky.

When it comes to food ... the "Real Housewives of Atlanta" star demands Popeyes fried chicken. The contract states: "Please do not substitute for KFC or Churches, we know the difference."

But ... even though she won't eat KFC birds ... she insists on KFC cole slaw.

Burruss is just as finicky about her bathroom requirements ... a brand new toilet seat for starters -- which must be installed under the supervision of the road manager or an assistant. Plus, the bathroom must be fully stocked with Cottonelle toilet paper and Dove soap.

Other demands:

-a black Mercedes Benz Sprinter
-golf carts and umbrellas in case of rain
-a police escort to skirt traffic jams -- because "under no circumstance shall Kandi be delayed arriving at or departing" from the venue.