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Rudy Giuliani's seen the writing on the wall -- about President Trump possibly rolling over on him -- and it makes him laugh, because he insists he has an impeccable track record.

We got Trump's attorney Monday evening at Reagan National, and remained defiant after the reports of a new federal investigation into his consulting biz. There's also been a buzz POTUS might throw him under the bus to save his own hide.

Hizzoner told us he's confident his nearly 30 years of friendship with Trump means there won't be any double-cross. Giuliani added he's got 50 years of "ethical, dedicated practice of the law."

The former NYC Mayor also had a brash message for the feds -- come get me!

Rudy said, "the people pursuing me are desperate, sad, angry, disappointing liars" ... and made it clear, in his eyes, they'll have egg on their faces if they try to take him down.

President Trump might not be giving Conan, the ISIS-killing dog, the Medal of Honor, but he did settle for a pat on the head in front of cameras at the White House.

DT brought out Conan -- the Belgian Malinois canine who's credited with helping take out ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi a few weeks ago in a U.S.-led raid -- and introduced her to the press in the Rose Garden ... going on to say he'd given the pooch a medal and plaque.

Of course, she wasn't eligible for the actual Medal of Honor -- those don't get dished out to nonhumans -- but it sounds like 45 wanted to honor Conan properly nonetheless.

He went on to explain Conan has recovered nicely after being injured in the raid, and apparently ... she's already gone on to do other missions for us. Trump also said that she's at peak age, and nowhere near retirement. These dogs go strong for around 6 years.

VP Mike Pence had the honor of petting the pooch through much of the announcement, and Conan certainly appeared to like it. She was calm and collected the entire time.

Mayor Pete Buttigieg was strong on the debate stage Wednesday night, but the glow of success clearly doesn't translate into dance moves ... at least not by the candidate himself.

The Iowa and New Hampshire frontrunner rolled up to Paschal's soul food restaurant in ATL Thursday morning, and he told our photog he embraces the dance that has become a mantra of sorts for the campaign ... saying it's a symbol of joy. The dance is set to Panic! at the Disco's, "High Hopes."

That said, when our photog asked Pete to step up and dance, he put his foot down, but not to bust a move. He confessed his shortcoming and made it clear ... dancing in the street -- or anywhere else -- was out of the question.

Martin Luther King III says he expects there to be significant movement in the numbers after the latest Democratic debate, but based on his recap ... that movement won't be positive for Joe Biden.

We got MLK3 at Tyler Perry Studios after the 10 candidates duked it out onstage Wednesday night in Atlanta, and he heaped praise on more than half of them.

King III tells us he thought Cory Booker and Kamala Harris particularly stood out, Mayor Pete wasn't too shabby and he's always interested to hear what Elizabeth Warren and Bernie Sanders have to say. Andrew Yang got some props too.

Do the math, and that leaves out Amy Klobuchar, Tulsi Gabbard, Tom Steyer and of course ... the former Vice President and one of the favorites to land the nomination, Biden.

The snub's not a big surprise, though ... Joe had a pretty rough night. He came out on the losing end of a couple big moments, including a pot shot from Booker about Biden's resistance to the legalization of marijuana.

MLK's son touched on that subject as well, mostly echoing Booker's message ... but did concede that Biden's insistence on doing more research on the subject isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Speaking of bad things -- Joe had another snafu while addressing violence against women by making a very poor choice of words ... and failing to recognize his mistake.

Gordon Sondland has wrapped up his bombshell impeachment testimony in D.C., but he's not worried about a hostile work environment ... he was just eager to get outta Dodge.

We caught the U.S. Ambassador to the European Union Wednesday after he pretty much rolled over on everyone in the Trump administration -- including DT himself -- by saying that despite Donald's protestations of "no quid pro quo" with Ukraine ... there absolutely was.

As the U.S. diplomat -- who works for 45 -- was on his way to his plane at Dulles International Airport, we wanted to know if he was concerned about going back to work now that he's blown the whistle on his boss.

Check it out ... Sondland tells us he's ready to get back to the grind, and that all of his coworkers from across the pond -- and, presumably, here at home in the State Dept. -- still talk to him, suggesting there's no worries with what he just said in front of Congress.

He doesn't seem stressed about any repercussions, including possibly being fired. Then we try asking him an interesting question about what he'll do on the flight back.

If Bernie Sanders wins the Democratic nomination for President ... he might have this endorsement from one of the biggest pop stars in the world to thank.

Ariana Grande just shared a couple photos with the 78-year-old Vermont Senator, thanking him for hitting up her concert in Atlanta Tuesday night and "making my whole night and for all that you stand for !"

She went on to say she's doing her best to register young voters and has already gotten more than 20k sign-ups at her shows. She added ... "i will never smile this hard again promise."

From the looks of it ... Bernie might not either!!!

Sanders is in town for tonight's fifth primary debate, which will feature 10 contenders for the Democratic nomination. Not that he needs the energy boost ... but ya gotta think a plug from Grande will provide one anyway.

BTW -- this isn't the first time Ariana and Bernie have had a noteworthy connection ... last month she posted "baby how u feelin" on Twitter, and he replied by tweeting he's ready to fight for Medicare for All.

She replied, "screaming" ... as many of her fans and Bernie fans are now, as well.

A$AP Rocky just got catapulted to "primary" status in the impeachment investigation of President Trump ... due to the EU Ambassador's testimony about a phone call regarding the rapper's Swedish assault case.

Rocky got roped into Wednesday's hearing because EU Ambassador Gordon Sondland said while he was sitting in a restaurant in Kiev on July 26 ... Trump called him and the "primary purpose" of their chat was A$AP.

Sondland testified Wednesday they mostly discussed A$AP's imprisonment in Sweden ... despite claims the phone call involved Trump inquiring about the Ukrainian government investigating Joe Biden and his son, Hunter.

As you'll recall, the rapper was jailed in Sweden for nearly 5 weeks as he awaited trial for assault following an altercation with a man on the street. He was eventually found guilty by a panel of judges, but with no further jail time ... Rocky bolted back to the States.

Trump was very vocal about the unfair treatment of Rocky and his administration got involved ... and Sondland says that's what they discussed on that July 26 call.

However -- pertaining to the impeachment investigation -- Sondland later testified the phone call also "included the subject of investigations" into the Bidens, and stated there was a quid pro quo established between Trump and Ukraine.

Rep. Eric Swalwell seemed to cut the cheese live on national TV ... but the cheese, as it turns out, was apparently a studio mug.

The California congressman was doing an interview Monday on MSNBC's 'Hardball' with host Chris Matthews -- and while he was going on and on about Ukraine and alleged malfeasance by DT ... something that sounded like a loud, wet fart blasted through the airwaves.

It certainly seemed like flatulence, and Rep. Swalwell even paused a moment right afterward in what many viewed as an acknowledgment of the ripped gas. And, of course, #fartgate and #shartgate soon started to trend everywhere on Twitter as a result.

Funny enough, the official 'Hardball' account excused the noise away as someone dragging a coffee mug across a table in the studio -- which just happened to get picked up on a mic.

Swalwell was ecstatic, quickly using the network's cover as what he described as "TOTAL EXONERATION!" -- very Trump-like, right?! And yes, everyone had a good laugh over it -- Republicans and Dems alike. It might've been the most uniting thing in a while, actually.

And, for those looking to go even deeper down the rabbit hole ... some have pointed to a theory that the would-be fart actually came from Matthews. Apparently, there's a history of gas being passed on his show over the years, as one Twitter user dutifully pointed out.

Anyway, if these impeachment hearings are lacking pizzazz -- as NBC News itself noted last week -- then Swalwell (or Matthews) just dropped a much-needed fun fart bomb.

South Dakota's anti-meth campaign featuring people appearing to admit they're addicted is already working ... according to Governor Kristi Noem, who says extreme shock was the intent of the tagline.

Gov. Noem launched the initiative Monday with the slogan "Meth. We're On It" ... which, at first glance, makes ya think the state's changing its name to Methopotamia -- but the Gov. tells TMZ ... she's cool with that kinda Internet buzz.

She's thrilled the campaign is trending and "sparking conversations around the state and the country." She says people are finally "talking about how they can be part of the solution and not just the problem."

The campaign includes a new TV ad, posters, billboards and a website, and is meant to raise awareness of the growing crisis in South Dakota -- as well as many other states -- and how to fight it. The state has reportedly spent nearly $500k on the campaign, so far.

Noem added, "This is a bold, innovative effort like the nation has never before seen. Over the next few weeks, this campaign will operate through various mediums to educate every person across South Dakota on signs of addiction, resources available to combat addiction, and strategies to engage communities in recovery."

In other words, the Governor fully believes South Dakota's on it!

Adam Carolla thinks Joe Biden is a bit of a dinosaur trying to roam the 2019 landscape -- and when he calls weed a "gateway drug" ... AC thinks Biden's making himself extinct.

We ran into the comedian Monday night in WeHo and asked him about something JB said recently on the campaign trail that's kinda having people -- mostly millennials, frankly -- rolling their eyes and looking at the former VEEP as an old-timer and out of touch.

ICYMI ... Biden was at a Vegas town hall this weekend and got asked if his stance on legalizing recreational marijuana nationally has changed. Apparently, Joe wasn't for it in the first place, and still isn't -- saying there's not "enough evidence" to pull the trigger.

Adam notes that the term "gateway drug" is incredibly antiquated, and then goes on to list a number of things and experiences in life that can potentially lead to some damage.

Watch ... he gets pretty introspective, and it kinda makes you think about it. It should also be mentioned -- Adam sits on a weed advisory board, so he's about that life.

Dan Bilzerian's dead set on running for President of the United States and winning, and to show he's serious ... he's willing to give up a few of his favorite things.

The popular playboy poker player tells TMZ ... he wasn't joking when he recently told us he plans to run for Prez in 2024, and he vows to go straight edge if he's elected -- no sex, drugs or alcohol -- and will abstain his entire time in office.

Dan says he'll be quitting those activities to both focus on the task at hand and prove to voters he means business ... consider it his major campaign promise.

As for what else he'll run on ... Bilzerian tells us he believes the world needs his help, there's too much corruption and too many laws, and saving the environment should be a top priority.

He also says he'll run as a Republican, but points out he has some traditionally liberal views too. For instance -- Dan's very pro-gun, but he's also pro-choice. He says he's pro-gay rights but doesn't agree with hormone treatments or sex changes for people under 18.

Bilzerian does give us a caveat -- he recognizes becoming a presidential candidate will drastically alter his life, so he says he might need more time to commit ... in which case he'll run in 2028.

Dan's already got one thing going for him -- he's pretty damn rich. With an estimated net worth of $150 million, he says he plans to use half his money for his campaign and the other half for philanthropy.

He tells us he plans on giving it his all and thinks he has a pretty good chance of winning. Of course, he seems to think he'll have an even better shot if Kanye West isn't one of his opponents.

Jane Fonda's still walking the walk -- marching with and sitting in with environmental protesters in D.C. -- but now when the cops move in, Jane heads for higher ground.

The iconic actress and activist was there to stage the sixth consecutive Fire Drill Fridays protest on Capitol Hill. As you know, Jane's been arrested 4 times, but she did not end up in handcuffs this time. Police moved in when the group sat and chanted in the rotunda of the Capitol, and warned demonstrators they were about to be rounded up.

At that point, Jane was high above on a balcony ... still chanting along with her comrades in protest -- but steering clear of arrest. It's the second week she hasn't been arrested -- and as we reported last week ... that's exactly what the protest planners want.

The folks behind Fire Drill Fridays say Jane's best value to the group is remaining the weekly face of their activities on the Hill -- and they begged her to avoid a 5th arrest.

As we told you, due to a previous bust ... Jane already has an open court date, and if she's thrown in jail a fifth time she risks remaining behind bars for 30 to 90 days.

The last time cops took Jane into custody, on November 1, she had to spend a night in jail -- but for now, she's staying high.

George Lopez has a take on the House impeachment hearings that might actually surprise you -- let it sort itself out and whatever the outcome, find common ground as Americans.

We got the comedian out at LAX Wednesday afternoon and wanted to get his take on the historic hearings. George's initial default was to joke about it -- saying it's must-see TV like the Super Bowl -- but then it turned serious.

George, an ardent critic of President Trump, said if the hearings result in Trump's impeachment, then the efforts proved valid. And, if the hearings return empty results, George says he'd be the first to say, "my bad."

But, get this ... George says whatever the outcome, he wants everyone to find a way to find common ground. Because in the end ... everyone should just want what's best for this nation.

Pete Buttigieg says while his odds to the win the White House might be similar to Donald Trump's a year out from election day ... he's going about getting there with a full 180.

The South Bend Mayor spoke to us Wednesday on "TMZ Live" after news broke that he's the leading Democratic candidate in Iowa, according to a new poll ... not to mention that his chances at going the distance are eerily similar to DT's from this time 4 years ago.

He weighs in on both, telling us the new poll reflects what he's been feeling on the ground ... a connection to voters and a groundswell that just can't be stopped.

As for the Trump comparison, he says the only thing he wants to share with 45 is the final destination. That said, he does admit there are similarities in how folks perceived their campaigns early on -- namely, they were seen as odd men out despite later success.

Then, we got into what could become a problem ... how PB plans to deal with religious voters -- especially in the South -- who may view the fact he's gay as a dealbreaker.

California Governor Gavin Newsom says President Trump isn't going to bully the Golden State into doing what he wants -- even with threats that could put thousands of lives at risk.

The Gov. was on "TMZ Live" Tuesday with a fierce response to POTUS tweeting he might cut federal funding to help fight California's wildfires ... if Newsom didn't get his "act together" to stop the fires.

Newsom made it clear he's not about to bow because the reality is the Prez needs Cali more than it needs him. He says Trump likes to spew threats as "political theater," and also because he can't stand NOT getting his way in the most populous state.

As the Gov. put it, Trump's political pressure won't fly in Cali.

On a much lighter note, we also got Gov. Newsom -- who just might have the best gubernatorial hairline in America -- to talk about this year's CA Hall of Fame inductees ... who include George Lopez, RuPaul, Wolfgang Puck and the late Dr. Maya Angelou.

The ceremony goes down in Sacramento on December 10, and Newsom's honored to be inducting such a diverse group of talented people.

President Trump's impeachment hearing is turning into #paperclipgate ... because Rep. Jackie Speier is addressing witnesses while a paper clip is stuck in her hair!!!

Check out this wacky scene from Capitol Hill ... the Congresswoman from California was thanking Bill Taylor and George Kent for their testimonies when several viewers picked up on a shiny, seemingly metal object clearly visible in her 'do.

It's pretty bizarre, and most folks are convinced it's a paper clip. Sure looks like one, and that begs the obvious question -- WHY is there a paper clip just chillin' in Jackie's hair?

Look, we know this has zero impact on the real issue of Trump's potential impeachment ... but it's also hard to ignore when you see a Congresswoman rocking a paper clip on live TV!!!