Comedy

Get ready for a slurry of avocado ice cream and deflated football jokes ... Tom Brady has signed up to be roasted as part of a new deal with Netflix.

The streaming service giant announced Tuesday it's making a series of new specials called "Greatest Roasts of All Time: GROAT" -- and TB12 is slated to be one of the first roastees.

Netflix says Brady will also serve as an executive producer for the series ... and the company actually clowned on the Tampa Bay Bucs star in its announcement for it all.

"We can't wait to burn three-time Super Bowl-losing quarterback Tom Brady, who only went back to the NFL in order to delay this roast," Netflix Vice President of Stand-up and Comedy Formats Robbie Praw said in a statement.

"In all seriousness, it's a huge thrill to work with the greatest football player of all time on this project. No one’s better at taking hits and still coming out on top, so we know the roast will be a breeze for Brady."

Brady had fun with the announcement, too ... channeling Marshawn Lynch by saying, "I'm just here so I won't get fined."

Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard is a tragic story about the crumbling of a marriage and horrendous allegations ... but there's another layer to this trial that 'SNL' dared to say out loud ... it's fun to watch and ridiculously entertaining.

As the anchor who threw to the courtroom said, there are all sorts of problems in the world ... Ukraine, supply shortages, but ... "I know it’s not the most pertinent story ... but with all the problems in the world, isn’t nice to have a news story we can all collectively watch and say: 'Ooh. Glad it ain’t me'?"

Kyle Mooney played an excellent Johnny, and his lawyer zeroed in on one of the more lurid parts of the case ... allegations that Amber or one of her friends crapped on Johnny's side of the bed out of revenge.

There were objections by Amber's counsel, but they were overruled because the judge delivered the following ruling ... "It does sound fun, and this trial is for fun.”

There's a hilarious video that was played in the courtroom, where the property manager -- Kenan Thompson -- discovers the poop. The housekeeper joins in the room and there's a discussion of who cleans up the dookie.

It's hilarious for sure, but the poop in the bed is actually relevant to the case. As we reported, Amber was allegedly enraged when Johnny was late for her birthday party, showed up for a few minutes and then left. Johnny says he got a call from the housekeeper the next day saying she found poop on his side of the bed that was covered up by sheets.

Tiffany Haddish says she's a coy person, so she's really trying hard not to spill the beans about a rumored music project with Beyonce ... but there's a lot of smoke that could lead to something fire!

The "Girls Trip" star joined us on "TMZ Live" Friday and hinted at an upcoming collab with Queen B ... and even though she was coy and bashful about possibly getting in the studio with one of her music idols, there's enough between the lines to believe it may be happening, or it already went down.

Tiffany's been making new music with the likes of Trina and Jada Pinkett Smith, and we've been hearing she was also recruiting Beyonce, Snoop Dogg and Lil Wayne to the project.

One thing is for certain ... Tiffany really admires Beyonce's work, and let's be honest, who wouldn't want to get with Bey in the studio?!?

It's interesting ... Tiffany says her original plan was to only use the music in movies and TV shows she's producing but not acting in, but she tells us why the financials might cause her to change course and drop the music publicly first.

Tiffany's a jack of all trades in Hollywood ... she just released a new book about bullying and being yourself, "Layla, the Last Black Unicorn," which she hopes helps kids who are going through some tough times.

Big E's broken neck isn't going to stop him from living life ... the WWE superstar hit up Marlon Wayans' comedy show -- wearing his neck brace -- Friday night in Florida.

The former WWE champ posted a picture on Instagram of him and Marlon at the Seminole Hard Rock Event Center in Tampa ... with the two sharing a friendly embrace.

"Massive thanks to @hardrocktampa for a fun night of hob nobbing. (That sounds filthier than intended…)" E captioned the photo.

The event is worth noting 'cause E recently (March 11) suffered a devastating injury in the ring (well, technically outside of it) when fellow Superstar Ridge Holland dumped the 5'11", 285 lb. star on his head, breaking his neck in the process.

After the belly-to-belly suplex went terribly wrong, E was carted out of the arena on a stretcher, and taken directly to a local hospital for treatment. He ultimately had surgery ... which thankfully went well, according to the wrestler.

Things could've been far worse for E ... doctors say he could've suffered a stroke, paralysis, or worse, death.

Seeing Big E out and about, smiling, is a welcome sight for WWE fans ... who are obviously concerned about the WWE Superstar's health.

Sarah Silverman has a fascinating take on whether Trump should be allowed back on Twitter -- and it all has to do with what George Washington and co. could or couldn't predict.

We ran into the comedian Wednesday in NYC and asked what she made of Elon Musk essentially saying he's going to bring the ex-Prez back onto the bird app -- once his mega $44-billion deal closes, that is -- and she had a very nuanced answer that's worth hearing.

Check it out ... she says her feelings on this have evolved -- first, it was relief that DT got the boot after Jan. 6 ... but then she started thinking about what free speech is supposed to mean philosophically -- namely, tolerating abhorrent speech you don't agree with.

Sarah seems to have thought maybe Trump should've actually been allowed to stay in light of that -- but upon further reflection ... she suggests banning him might've been best.

Her argument boils down to what our founding fathers envisioned when they were writing the Constitution, and she uses the Second Amendment as a good example of an arguably outdated fundamental right we have that didn't have AR-15s in the minds of the framers when it was drafted.

That same logic, Sarah says, could be applied to social media ... the OGs certainly didn't foresee Twitter or the far-reaching impact it has on the masses.

Andy Dick is in custody after the trailer he's been living in was surrounded by cops, placing the actor in handcuffs and hauling him away ... and the whole thing was broadcast live.

Law enforcement sources tell TMZ Dick's been arrested for felony sexual battery after an adult male at the O'Neill Regional Park claimed the comedian sexually assaulted him.

The arrest was streamed on Captain Content's RV live stream Wednesday. You see several Orange Co. Sheriff's Deputies speaking with Dick before walking him to their vehicles, continuing the conversation and eventually cuffing him and taking him away.

Dick and a group of live streamers have been living at the site in RVs for some time now ... sheriff's deputies were seen entering Dick's trailer and searching it after he was placed into custody. They also asked to collect the male victim's pants as evidence.

It's not the first time Dick's had a serious encounter on a live stream. TMZ broke the story, cops performed a welfare check at a home Dick was staying at in Vegas last month after a man he was hanging out with pulled a gun during an argument on a live feed.

The man arrested for attacking Dave Chappelle will remain behind bars, at least for now ... after a judge refused to reduce his bail.

Isaiah Lee was in court Tuesday, in Los Angeles ... asking for the judge to reduce his $30K bond, and to be released on his own recognizance. The judge denied the request and kept his bail the same. A photo from NBC 4 Los Angeles shows Lee looking solemn.

As we've told you, Lee has been charged with 4 misdemeanors, including possession of a weapon with intent to assault.

You'll recall ... Dave Chappelle was performing at the Hollywood Bowl earlier this month, when a guy lunged at him on stage ... just before tackling DC to the ground. Cops found a fake gun with a knife attached to the end of the barrel on the man.

Lee has pleaded not guilty to the charges.

If he's convicted, he'd face up to 18 months in county jail ... but it's not likely he'll serve that much time.

Chris Kattan wants to go clubbing with Will Ferrell again ... he's champing at the bit to make a sequel to their 1990s cult classic comedy.

We got the former 'SNL' star at LAX and asked him about the buzz for another "A Night At The Roxbury" flick -- and his answer will have nostalgic fans bobbing their heads like Doug and Steve Butabi.

Chris says fans have been calling for a 'Roxbury' sequel for far too long, and he's got some ideas on how to bring the story into the 21st century.

Picture this ... Chris thinks the new movie should pick up with Will's character married to his love interest from the OG film, Molly Shannon. As for Chris' character, he's got an interesting idea for where Doug's been spending his time, and it's NOT a nightclub!

The club scene has changed a lot since Chris and Will were trying to get into the Roxbury ... and CK wants a sequel to feature the Butabi bros trying to fit in with today's younger club crowd.

Before this smizing teen took the stage as a stand-up comedian and actor, he was just your average boy always up to somethin', growing up in New Jersey.

This funny kid is best known for his roasting abilities and his comedic twist on all things celebrity and political. And if you watch comedy central, well then you most likely have seen his iconic Justin Bieber roast on the "Comedy Central Roast."

Need one more clue on who this jokester could be? He is likely to be seen wearing some kind of hat which is deemed as his signature look.

Amy Schumer is opening her comedy vault -- she just laid out another joke that Oscars honchos apparently said no to ... and this one's on video.

The comedian revealed her latest axed bit during a set for the 'Netflix Is a Joke' festival going on right now -- and at one point in her performance, she laid out what exactly it was that showrunners weren't really feeling from AS's pitched material.

Watch ... it's a gag that incorporates a bunch of the nominated films to make a sex joke about her husband. You can watch it for yourself -- we'll just say, it ends in pregnancy.

Whether it was funny or not ... well, that sorta depends on who you're asking, it seems. The joke seemed to land well for the live audience that received it -- they were laughing it up when she delivered it -- but if you go peep how folks online are taking it ... it ain't good.

This harkens back to last month when Amy revealed yet another joke she claims was scrapped ... which was about Alec Baldwin, something most folks didn't see much humor in.

The Baldwin joke wasn't caught on tape -- she talked about it during a stand-up show of hers in Vegas, where people's phones were locked away ... but it was reported on nonetheless. Whether any of these jokes were actually on the table is also anyone's guess.

She could just be making these up now/working them into her current set ... who knows. Either way, what did end up making it into her monologue that night worked extremely well. You'll recall ... she roasted everybody under the sun and got a great response at the time.

It's been less than a week since the Dave Chappelle bum-rush at the Hollywood Bowl, and another comic's already headlined the venue, apparently without incident ... John Mulaney.

The beloved comedian took the stage Saturday night with a couple of openers where Dave was attacked by a guy just a few short days ago -- and, according to reports, everything went swimmingly ... which might have to do with the beefed-up security on high alert.

THR's got a pretty description of the guards on hand and the vibe in general -- they say everyone had to go through the metal detectors and have their bag checked, per usual.

The difference now ... a wood panel that used to line the very front row and the stage was replaced by a fence -- and not just that, but apparently 10 security officers lined the stage from down below in addition to other guards that were in the second level and off to the sides too.

It might sound more intense than it actually was though -- while there weren't any phones allowed from the crowd, somebody did get a video of John exiting the stage to thunderous applause ... giving us a great view of the front of the stage, and the fence looks wimpy.

John even acknowledged it in his set -- poking fun at HB security and the Chappelle incident in general ... reportedly saying, "we have great security. This fence is so jumpable it’s crazy."

Another reference to the stage crasher ... John challenged the crowd (jokingly, of course) by saying, "No one’s going to do anything. You don’t have the balls." He went on to riff about how great rushing the stage would be for whatever cause someone was all about.

His two openers, Earthquake and Seaton Smith, also referenced Isaiah Lee ... but kept it mild, it seems. In the end, it appears everyone had a good time -- and no one got hurt.

'SNL' did a really smart cold open Saturday night ... challenging what appears to be the Supreme Court's notion that tradition should stand in the way of change.

It was pretty brilliant ... the host Benedict Cumberbatch, along with Andrew Dismukes, Alex Moffat, Kate McKinnon, Chris Redd and Cecily Strong played characters back in 1235, when the laws were incredibly draconian. The point -- these ideas have no place a thousand years later.

There's a hilarious moment when Cumberbatch says, "It’s just while I was cleaning the hole on the side of the castle where we poop and then it falls through the sky into a hole of human feces, I started to think about abortion. Don’t you think we ought to make a law against that?"

The reply ... "You mean like to know we have against pointy shoes?"

At one point someone asks, "Shouldn't we at least make exceptions in cases of rape or incest? Moffat jumps on that ... "But those are the only kinds of sex."

Then there's a turn where somehow mask-wearing becomes relevant, and even Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard becomes grist for the group.

Bill Maher delivered a scorching attack on the movement in the U.S. to censor what we say ... and gotta say, it may be his best commentary in a long time.

The "Real Time" host declared his position from the jump -- "Sorting out lies from truth is your job," adding it's ridiculous we treat everyone like "helpless dumb blondes ready to believe everything ... like Donald Trump!"

He makes the point ... people living today aren't special -- as he says, every age is the misinformation age. He harkens back to 1858, when the New York Times worried Americans couldn't handle the transatlantic telegraph because it was "superficial and too fast for the truth."

Go back even further, Bill says, to 1487, when the Pope cautioned against the misuse of the printing press, saying it was the source of pernicious writing -- hmmm, sounds like fake news.

And, then there's radio ... in 1938, some listeners freaked out listening to Orson Welles' "War of the Worlds," believing the Martians invaded New Jersey.

As Bill says, lies are everywhere ... like germs. He says you can't germproof the world, so develop a better bull*** meter.

And, then he makes a brilliant point ... "Sometimes misinformation is history's first draft" -- like the stories that circulated about COVID -- that 50% of those who are unvaccinated become hospitalized when it's less than 1%.

To drive home the point, he notes lots of folks believe in "an imaginary best friend in the sky who they can talk to to help them with their problems." Bill asks if there should be a warning label on that.

He's all for banning things like child porn, calls for insurrection, personal threats, etc, but people should be able to express their opinions even if they are repugnant. And, deciding whether something is true, half-true, a quarter true or false ... well that's our job, not the job of some publisher.

The man who charged at Dave Chappelle onstage will have to come up with $30,000 bail before he gets out of a jail cell.

Isaiah Lee made his first appearance in an L.A. courtroom Friday morning to face 4 misdemeanor charges -- and he looked very much worse for wear following the beatdown he got at the Hollywood Bowl.

Lee's right arm was in a cast and a sling when he entered the courtroom and entered a not guilty plea on all charges. He was represented by a public defender who told the judge, Lee had suffered a broken arm -- something that was painfully obvious as he was being hauled out of the Bowl on a stretcher.

If he's able to come up with bail, Lee will be under a protective order ... requiring him to stay at least 100 yards away from the Hollywood Bowl, Dave and any other venue at which the comedian performs.

As we reported, the L.A. County D.A., George Gascon, passed on felony charges for Lee and punted the case to the City Attorney, who charged Lee with possession of a weapon with intent to assault and unauthorized access to the stage area during a performance.

Gabriel Iglesias is gearing up for some record-setting gigs at his beloved Dodger Stadium, and, in the wake of the Dave Chappelle incident ... he's not worried about getting got by violent hecklers.

Gabriel, AKA Fluffy, joined "TMZ Live" to talk about being the first comedian ever to perform at the iconic home of the L.A. Dodgers, as a part of the "Netflix Is A Joke" 12-day festival.

Fluffy tells us he wanted to go big or go home, and sure enough ... this is the biggest venue he's ever played. He's filling more than 45,000 seats this weekend, making it the 3rd biggest comedy show ever ... and the biggest ever in Los Angeles.

Of course, the attack on Chappelle is on the mind of all comedians -- many are ramping up security measures -- but Gabriel says he's not worried at all.

He broke news with us about someone jumping on his stage last week in Seattle ... revealing his security team -- which he calls the best -- immediately took down the guy. But, "professionally," he says.

Pete Davidson is poking fun at Kanye West's divorce from Kim Kardashian ... comparing his girlfriend's ex-hubby to a famous Robin Williams movie character.

The 'SNL' star came out swinging in his stand-up set on "Netflix Is a Joke: The Festival" ... shading Kanye for being a modern-day Mrs. Doubtfire.

Pete asks the crowd ... "Does anybody else secretly hope that, like, Kanye pulls like a Mrs. Doubtfire? I come home one day and they're like, this is the new housekeeper. And, he's like, "What's up fam?"

Of course, Robin played the title character in the 1993 movie about a divorced actor who dresses up as a female housekeeper to be able to see his kids.

Pete even joked about the Kanye allegedly spreading rumors he had AIDS ... joking John Mulaney called him and told him the best way to respond would be to spread a rumor Kanye has Polio.

Pete's bit went on ... he says he's not bothered by Kanye's collab with his friend Jack Harlow ... joking the thing that would offend him is if comedian Bill Burr suddenly showed up at Sunday Service.