Humor

Elon Musk has a smashing success on his hands, and we mean that in the worst way possible because his new Tesla Cybertruck -- billed as shatterproof -- shattered moments after he unveiled it.

We'll say this ... if Elon isn't firing a handful of people right now, he's going soft. On Thursday at SpaceX HQ in Hawthorne, CA ... he pulled back the curtain on the Cybertruck, and had a staffer throw a metal ball at the driver side windows to prove the near-indestructibility of its "armor glass."

It couldn't have gone worse as both windows shattered. Elon seemed to vamp to find a silver lining, saying ... "It didn't go through. That's a plus side."

It was reminiscent of some of SpaceX's early Falcon 9 rocket disasters. 'Memba this one? Juuuuust a bit outside of the landing pad, and into the drink!

To be fair, the Falcon 9 works like a charm now, so maybe that bodes well for the Cybertruck's future, but calling its introduction an embarrassment is an enormous understatement.

In fact, it went sooooo badly, it smells of a setup. The question -- was Elon in on it, just to make sure the new Cybertruck unveiling went viral? OR, was Elon set up by prankster employees?

If it's the latter, like we said ... someone's looking into unemployment benefits right now.

The top 3 "Jeopardy!" contestants to ever win big are going head-to-head (to head) on TV -- and one guy who had a great run thinks he knows what sorta questions will be asked.

We spoke to Austin Rogers -- who had a 12-game winning streak in 2017 -- and he mused with us over what Alex Trebek and his crafty writers are gonna ask Ken Jennings, Brad Rutter and James Holzhauer come Jan. 7 for "Jeopardy! The Greatest of All Time."

It's exactly what it sounds like -- these guys have amassed the most cash out of anyone on the show, and it's time find out who's the true king in a 3-way face-off. As for what'll be asked -- or answered, rather -- Austin tells us the "Jeopardy!" crew will get diabolical.

Fact is, Austin says the writers know exactly how to tailor the topics for these three -- and he believes they'll be throwing pop culture curveballs instead of ancient history softballs.

Check it out -- Austin even weighs in on who he thinks has an edge here among these titans of trivia, and it sounds like our boy, James, is in the driver's seat with his scattered approach in hunting for Daily Doubles ... and his go big or go home wagers.

Good luck, fellas!!!

Rep. Eric Swalwell seemed to cut the cheese live on national TV ... but the cheese, as it turns out, was apparently a studio mug.

The California congressman was doing an interview Monday on MSNBC's 'Hardball' with host Chris Matthews -- and while he was going on and on about Ukraine and alleged malfeasance by DT ... something that sounded like a loud, wet fart blasted through the airwaves.

It certainly seemed like flatulence, and Rep. Swalwell even paused a moment right afterward in what many viewed as an acknowledgment of the ripped gas. And, of course, #fartgate and #shartgate soon started to trend everywhere on Twitter as a result.

Funny enough, the official 'Hardball' account excused the noise away as someone dragging a coffee mug across a table in the studio -- which just happened to get picked up on a mic.

Swalwell was ecstatic, quickly using the network's cover as what he described as "TOTAL EXONERATION!" -- very Trump-like, right?! And yes, everyone had a good laugh over it -- Republicans and Dems alike. It might've been the most uniting thing in a while, actually.

And, for those looking to go even deeper down the rabbit hole ... some have pointed to a theory that the would-be fart actually came from Matthews. Apparently, there's a history of gas being passed on his show over the years, as one Twitter user dutifully pointed out.

Anyway, if these impeachment hearings are lacking pizzazz -- as NBC News itself noted last week -- then Swalwell (or Matthews) just dropped a much-needed fun fart bomb.

Adam Carolla thinks Joe Biden is a bit of a dinosaur trying to roam the 2019 landscape -- and when he calls weed a "gateway drug" ... AC thinks Biden's making himself extinct.

We ran into the comedian Monday night in WeHo and asked him about something JB said recently on the campaign trail that's kinda having people -- mostly millennials, frankly -- rolling their eyes and looking at the former VEEP as an old-timer and out of touch.

ICYMI ... Biden was at a Vegas town hall this weekend and got asked if his stance on legalizing recreational marijuana nationally has changed. Apparently, Joe wasn't for it in the first place, and still isn't -- saying there's not "enough evidence" to pull the trigger.

Adam notes that the term "gateway drug" is incredibly antiquated, and then goes on to list a number of things and experiences in life that can potentially lead to some damage.

Watch ... he gets pretty introspective, and it kinda makes you think about it. It should also be mentioned -- Adam sits on a weed advisory board, so he's about that life.

Dear Adam Archuleta ...

A "Dirty Sanchez" mustache isn't what you think it is -- it's WAYYYY WORSE -- and you probably shouldn't be referencing it during an NFL game ON LIVE TV!!

For those unaware, a "Dirty Sanchez" is most commonly described on Urban Dictionary as a temporary mustache wiped on to one's face ... and it's comprised of fecal matter.

In other words, it's a poop 'stache!

Good times, huh?!

Anyway, Archuleta -- former NFL star-turned-broadcaster -- was working the Bills vs. Dolphins game for CBS this weekend with Spero Dedes, when Spero asked if Adam could grow a mustache by next week.

"I could probably squeeze out maybe a Dirty Sanchez, not really a full stache," Archuleta said.

Ewwwwwwwwww!!!!!!

Innocent mistake? Yeah, probably.

Will this haunt him for a while? Yeah, probably.

Ohio Bobcats basketball coach Jeff Boals channeled his inner Conor McGregor to celebrate a huge road win on Wednesday ... and it's an epic collection of cringe-worthy and awesome moves!!

The 'Cats are off to a hot 3-0 start under the first-year coach ... and it's safe to say the players are LOVING the new guy, 'cause they joined his locker room dance-off after beating Iona in New York, 81-72.

The video is hilarious -- there's the billi strut, shoulder-brushing and a bunch of other moves that would make Chris Brown blush.

Okay, maybe that's not true ... but it definitely looks like the boys in Athens are having a helluva time.

Boals -- a former Bobcats hooper himself -- also served as an assistant coach at Ohio State before taking the head coaching gig at Stony Brook from 2016-2019.

President Trump's impeachment hearing is turning into #paperclipgate ... because Rep. Jackie Speier is addressing witnesses while a paper clip is stuck in her hair!!!

Check out this wacky scene from Capitol Hill ... the Congresswoman from California was thanking Bill Taylor and George Kent for their testimonies when several viewers picked up on a shiny, seemingly metal object clearly visible in her 'do.

It's pretty bizarre, and most folks are convinced it's a paper clip. Sure looks like one, and that begs the obvious question -- WHY is there a paper clip just chillin' in Jackie's hair?

Look, we know this has zero impact on the real issue of Trump's potential impeachment ... but it's also hard to ignore when you see a Congresswoman rocking a paper clip on live TV!!!

Justin Bieber seems to still have Tom Cruise on his mind, 'cause he unwittingly recreated an iconic movie moment made famous by the actor ... just without as much horse power.

JB was out with his wife, Hailey, Sunday riding around L.A. on what looks like a pretty nifty bicycle, which has a seat attached on the back. Hailey was riding top shotgun, holding on about as tight as Kelly McGillis did on Tom's Kawasaki Ninja motorcycle all those years ago.

Yes, we're referring to 'Top Gun' ... and if you check out the video of Mr. and Mrs. Biebs cruising around Bev Hills, it's reminiscent of Maverick and Charlie's ride through San Diego.

Of course, Justin himself might've had to work a little harder here than TC did in the flick. The bike doesn't look or sound motorized in any way, so he was definitely pedaling his heart out to get the missus off the busy main roads ... with traffic building up behind him.

Who knows if Justin actually knew he was harkening back to the '80s here with this joyride, but we'd like to think so ... assuming he still wants to go toe-to-toe with Tom, that is.

Rip Taylor put a lot of heart into his comedic gags for decades, but ultimately heart troubles did him in ... according to his death certificate.

TMZ's obtained the document, which lists Taylor's immediate cause of death as congestive heart failure. It also lists heart disease as an underlying cause.

As we reported ... Rip passed away last month in Beverly Hills. The certificate says he died at the Cedars-Sinai Medical Center.

We've also learned the famous comedian's ashes were to be scattered at sea off the coast of Honolulu ... no word if any confetti was involved.

Dubbed the "King of Camp and Confetti" and "The Crying Comedian," Rip will be remembered for his flamboyant style and appearance, countless appearances on talk shows and his brief stint hosting "The $1.98 Beauty Show."

He also guest-starred in flicks like "Wayne's World 2," "Indecent Proposal," "Tom & Jerry: The Movie," "Chatterbox!" and "Jackass 3D" ... and was a successful voice actor.

Taylor was 84.

"Storage Wars" star Rene Nezhoda just found a virtual pot of gold buried in a Dallas storage locker -- because it's filled with trinkets from "The Dude Perfect Show."

Rene -- who runs the Bargain Hunters Thrift Store featured on the reality show -- tells TMZ ... he and two buddies, Jeremy Hales and Justin Grimes, dropped $2,770 on a storage unit this week in Texas, and when they got inside they realized it used to belong to the super-popular YouTube stars.

"Dude Perfect" has a massive following -- 47.1 million subscribers -- so you've probably seen their insane sports trick shot videos, or recognize them from their Super Bowl commercial.

It's quite a haul for Rene ... the storage locker is filled with "Dude Perfect" props dating back to their first season -- trophies, a massive baseball mitt, the famous panda costume and more.

George Lopez says the chaos and literal bloodshed that's erupting over the Popeyes famous chicken sandwich just ain't worth it, especially considering what he believes you're actually eating.

The comedian was at LAX Tuesday when he weighed in on the frenzy over the notorious sandwich's comeback, telling us plain and simple ... don't get taken out for a chicken breast between a couple of buns -- 'cause there's more to live for beyond that.

ICYMI ... full-on brawls have been breaking out at Popeye's restaurants across the country over these things, and one guy even got stabbed to death waiting in line for one.

Like we said ... utter madness.

BTW, if you're gonna go and get yourself killed over something, George thinks there's only one thing worth the ultimate sacrifice. We think he's kidding. We hope he is.

As far as GL is concerned, people have lost sense of what's important. Besides, he thinks what's going into these chickens isn't all that healthy to begin with.

Justice Sonia Sotomayor is just like us on the weekends -- ready to unwind ... and, more importantly, ready to uncork.

The Supreme Court associate judge was spotted at a mom-and-pop shop in D.C. over the weekend, where she eventually made her way to the booze aisle, and seemed to take a liking to a couple bottles of reds. In this photo, it looks like she's deciding between the two.

If she's truly wise -- and we know she is -- she probably took both of them home and decided later. Seems like a lady next to her was making other suggestions as well.

Can't blame Sonia for loading up on the vino ahead of what appears to be a busy schedule this week for her and her SCOTUS colleagues. They're scheduled to hear arguments on a number of cases Monday through Wednesday -- which include some meaty topics like immigration, police conduct, maritime law, copyright claims and others.

Bradley Cooper and Dave Chappelle seem to have kept their onscreen friendship in "A Star is Born" going strong in real life ... with the help of some youngsters to bring 'em even closer.

The actor and comedian were spotted hanging out Saturday in NYC's West Village, where Brad was seen holding his own daughter, Lea, in one arm and the hand of another little girl who was rolling with him, Dave and some other grownups tagging along.

It's unclear if the other kid is Dave's -- we know he's got a 10-year-old daughter of his own, but this girl here looks a bit younger than her. Either way, Brad seemed happy to play chaperone twice over while Dave hung back and looked on with a big grin.

Of course, Brad and Dave starred opposite each other in last year's Oscar fave 'ASIB,' with the two of them playing old pals reuniting at a difficult time in Brad's character's life.

While their chemistry on the big screen might've felt palpable and even lifted from a real-life relationship ... it turns out that BC and DC hadn't known one another all that well prior to filming. Dave said Brad recruited him hard to be in his movie, and Dave finally caved.

Prior to that, the two stars had apparently only met in passing ... but it looks like working together made 'em good pals. Brad was even on hand last week in D.C., where Dave was awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor and gave a speech on Dave's behalf.

Chrissy Teigen says John Legend got tipsy and then belted out one of his most famous tunes to a theme park crowd ... leaving him sounding quite different than his usual self.

The model posted a video Saturday of her hubby on stage at Universal Studios from the night before, saying JL had a bit too much of the vino ... which put him in a melodic mood. She tweeted, "John got wine drunk and sang a song at universal studios last night."

Wearing what appeared to be a onesie with his mug stitched on, the singer could be heard attempting to get the lyrics out to his 2013 hit, "All Of Me." Key word ... attempting.

Not to say that John sounded that bad here ... he still crooned better than any Joe even with a bit of booze in his system. But, he's certainly not as polished as he normally is, especially when he tries to hit that high note on the post-chorus "all of me" part. Yeesh ...

As for John ... he had a slightly different version of events, not mentioning any wine in his own post.

He says he and the fam went to Halloween Horror Nights before they shut down, with matching onesies as the costume theme. On the singing moment, he writes ... "Then I found a reluctant DJ with a mic and serenaded myself. It was a night."

Either way, the crowd (and Chrissy) seemed to love every bit of it. Take it away, John!!!

Wanna see grown-ass college football players cower in fear over a harmless Halloween prank??

Good ... 'cause University of Pittsburgh football staffers scared the crap out of their team with a fake mannequin -- and the video of the players' reactions is HILARIOUS!!

The team's assistant director of player personnel, Karlo Zovko, pretended he was a dummy wearing a Pitt uniform ... and when guys walked by, he pounced.

Ya gotta watch the video ... some of the players hit the deck, some screamed out in fear -- and one of the dudes even threatened to punch Zovko in the face!!!

Pitt head coach Pat Narduzzi clearly loved watching it all ... he tweeted out the vid, writing, "Halloween Night, don't get tricked! Hail to Pitt!"

Kim Kardashian is an Ivy League-caliber lawyer, at least for Halloween ... because she's recreating Reese Witherspoon's famous scene from "Legally Blonde."

Kim's going as Elle Woods for Halloween this year, and she's going all-out with a spot-on costume AND a carbon copy of the video essay Elle put together to gain admittance to Harvard Law School.

It's the perfect costume for Kim. As you know, she's setting her sights on becoming a lawyer, just like Reese's character in the super-popular romantic comedy.

Ya gotta see the video, Kim's pulling out all the stops to follow in Elle's footsteps ... with a couple wardrobe changes, some movie extras, multiple sets and some high-quality production value.

Gotta admire Kim's Halloween spirit!!!

For those unfamiliar with "Legally Blonde" ... Reese plays a sorority queen with an eye for fashion who wants to win back her ex-boyfriend by getting a law degree from Harvard.

And, unlike Blac Chyna, Kim's only pretending to apply to Harvard ... not posting fake acceptance letters.